A Letter To New York After Sandy

Dear Mayor Bloomberg,

 I would like to be the first in Texas to write you and extend our deepest sympathies over the tragic hurricane attack your shitty has fallen victim too. Rivalry aside, this is a terrible time for you all.

 We down in the gulf region know all too well the terrible devastation a hurricane attack can cause. Cheer up though you are a resourceful bunch, resilient in your strength and tenacious in the face of adversity and strong in your convictions. We here in Texas applaud you all and are certain that if you all stick together you can get the "Big Apple" on its feet in now time.

 I do want to say though, please do not come down here. We in Texas are still reeling from the welfare influx from Katrina the support we are still giving New Orleans is crippling and time consuming. We do not need or want your criminals mixing with the criminals from New Orleans. We do not need to be handing out any more welfare to any from your part of the United States, seriously the burden on our already hobbled budget is too taxed as it is and there are many other states that have the resources and the cash to accept your troubled citizenship. And quite frankly you all talk kinda funny.

 You all should stay up there focus on rebuilding "the city that never sleeps". Yeah that's the ticket, if you all work 24 7 like you all claim you could probably rebuild in the half the time it take New Orleans to recover (recovering).

 So um yeah that's all I really wanted to say. "Stay up there. DO NOT come down here!" and see if that fancy pants guy in the big house can send you all some help.

 Some advice though, don’t let those FEMA guys try to help they are more trouble than they are worth.

Sincerely

Rev. John Sleestaxx

 A Texas citizen.

Jena 6 and reverse standards BS

Check out this video: Tribute to Jena 6



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Truly not the best way to market the message.
I want to know why these young thugs get to beat someone to death because of skin color
and not be charge with a hate crime.
why would Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton even think of attaching their names to this fiasco.
Jesse I have another message for you. SHUT THE HELL UP! You sound stupid you sound uneducated you sound ignoratnt.
Where is Quanell X and Louis Farrakhan?
They know the smell of stupidity and stayed away like smart media whores.
They, the jena 6, are just as capable of displaying racist hate as anybody else.
I want to know why they are are allowed to display and kill in the name of race with out a hate crime attached.
I can not go to a high school football game without hearing "get that cracker! get that cracker" from the African
American teenage boys and then hear "yeah i can say that because i am black."
You know what, if i was to turn and say that that offends me they would turn and say that i was racist because i would not let a black person
have their right to free speech BUT!!! if i was to yell "get the nigga! get the nigga!" i would be in trouble for being racist.
You can not have it both ways. you can not complain about the crime and then commit the same crime. FUCK THEM!
The people screaming for the freedom of these 6 pieces of human waste need to think about what piece of shit they are getting behind.
These 6 are not what i want for future leaders. Neither should them.
They are not what i want in my community. neither shoudl them.
and these free choices of mine are not based on color but based on acts perpetrated under free will.
they chose to be animals. they chose to be fucking racist pigs and fuckers of dogs and cats.
they chose to be fucking morons who should be jailed and castrated like the fucking dumb shits they are.
they look like thugs they look like racists they smell of racial hate. they do nothing but bring down the community in which they live.
they are shit. they are a waste of human skin and oxygen. fucking lock them up and let them suck dick!
But do not try to make them into some kind of fucking hero.
If the white boys had done this they would be crucified as racial haters and there would be no march.
There would be no community leaders posing for photos.
Jesse Jackson do you know there are 12 yearold boys forced to commit sex acts for money every day? Of course you do!
Jesse Jackson why don't you do some good and help the 12 year old boys who are forced into sex slavery right here in America?
Al Sharpton are you aware of the little kids forced to be photographed and demeaned into sick twisted fantasies of grown men? Of Course you do.
Al Sharpton why don't you do some good and stop the child abuse that happens to both races?
Why indeed? Because there would be no media to photograph you. There would be no television news crew to hang on your every stupid ignorant word.
Go the fuck home count your fucking money and fuck off.
fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you

Why Lord, Oh Why?

Every once in while I wake up forget where I am think "Oh what a beautiful day.
Gee today is the first day of the rest of my life. I am going to make something of it!
“Yeah! Wahoo. Good morning Mr. blue bird! What a great day!
And then I am sent a video that I actually watch and I think yep I am back on planet earth alright.
Because there can be no other place in the god forsaken universe that this shit can happen



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGcAzX9E3qU




This tough guy better be sucking dick in prison.
I want to go to prison just to beat on this fuckers head.
I want to put this fucker in my garage and beat him daily.
Pull his fucking teeth out one at a time.
Pull his nails out after I put paper cuts on his finger webs.
This mother fuck should be fed to dogs.
What to do with Vick's dogs?? Use them as teaching instruments.
If this fucker can live for 7 days with these dogs retrained to eat him then,
Yeah he can have his 37 years sucking dick in prison.
How can I implore upon anybody the hate I feel right now? There is no know measurement known to the human race
I am so full of hate I think I may have a stroke. I am a crucible of hate and anger.
This piece of shit stink has no right to be allowed on the same planetary surface as me.
I would suspend this fucker by his ankles and whip his skin until he was raw.
I would then cover his body with sugar and let the fire ants have their way him.
This is too close to home for me.
I need a day off and some serious medications to forget this video.
Now why do I need the medications?
He is the one with the problem. Why is he still alive??
Oh god in heaven here the voice of your humble servant John Sleestaxx.
Why is this man alive oh lord?
I know you can not have a lesson for me here.
Why do I need a reminder of these horrors lord? Do I not deserve a night without the
Nightmares.
Yes I have nightmares.
I have zombie nightmares. About 5-6 a month.
I have people I know from the past chasing me and my family
And I am always trying to protect my family from the zombies
And I wake up in real sweats seriously dripping in water.
Two quarts of water is what is needed to quench the thirst. And for days I can't shake the
Feeling of loss, the feeling of dread every night.
The fear that I will not escape these nightmares is distracting and gets in my waking way
The next day. Then the feelings dissipate and I begin to get normal and then POW! BIFF!
WHAM! I get blind sided by some person I have known in the past, who is undead and wants to......
What are they trying to do to my family and me??
Maybe they are trying to get just me?
Maybe I have guilt.....LOL.... for past actions and the past is what I am trying
To get away from and I fear that I can not escape my past.
Hell I can believe most of this but this does not sound like it is fixable.
I would rather have the feelings everyday then to have them go away and come back.
Like every Sunday have the zombie dream get geared and ready for the week and then taper off for the weekend

Ah fucket this is my hell and I have made it and I have to live with it.
But the fucker seriously needs a 3 times daily ass whooping.
No 4 times daily, let us not forget the fourth meal. Crunchy, squishy, howling in pain, and dripping in his own blood, vomit, and shit.
FUCK HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
fuck fuck fuck
Damn him and the fucking video
I would have been so much better not having seen this travesty.


Sleestaxx

Memories and darker places

I was touching bad memories and evoking disturbing emotions the other day and thought that hey this ruined my Sunday how about I ruin everybody’s Tuesday. I am sorry but this is a bit of therapy for me and I now think I can start putting this to down I a tangable format.

I remember lying in bed at night praying that I would get to sleep before they got home. She would be too drunk to occupy him and once she fell asleep and he found me awake....well never mind that horror show. But I remember lying in bed thinking that there has to be a better place than this. Some place that did not hurt. Some place that was warm and nothing was threatening.
I used to think that I could remember a time when that was true. That if I squinted just right and pulled on the edges of my young memory I could see my real dad and my mom smiling and the sun out and there is a fish on the end of my line on my bamboo pole.
I remember laughing at my mom running from the fish as I pulled it out of the water too fast. I remember my dad, my real dad and how brave he was grabbing the squirming flopping fish without hesitation and pulling the hook out of the mouth that made the OH but never spoke.
Another time
I remember the principle coming to my house. I felt so proud when I opened the door and he was there. Man he seemed tall in the door way.
I remember the smile he greeted me with. I remember my mother asking if I was in trouble and him laughing and saying "John? Heavens no."
Then my square headed “Frankenstein” step dad coming in from the back yard and grumbling "who is this"
And my principle introduced him self.
My mother asking if he would like a drink or something. And he said that would not be necessary.
I got embarrassed then because principles do not eat or drink anything, and this must be a special occasion for him to leave school. Man, Mom you had to have known that!
My step father demanding to know why he was here.
He said 'he was here to talk about john'
I was told to go to my room.
I heard the principle say that last week there was test and
The dip shit failed...
No..... I shut the door.
There was murmuring and laughter
Then I heard my step father yelling and then I heard a slap
Then I heard my name being called
And I came out and I was asked what my name was and I told him “John Sleestaxx”.
My mother just sat there with her hand on her cheek and the principle sat there uncomfortable looking at his shoes.
Then my step father said, "there you go he's a Sleestaxx and there is no way a Sleestaxx is smart his real daddy is stupid and he is too.
You made a mistake and I want you all at the school to forget it. There will be no more tests for him and you will leave him in the class he is in." Leave me in my class? Man I must have really failed bad. They wanted to put me back into third grade.
I was glad about that because Miss Meyers was pretty and I liked being in her class.
Mom just sat there as the principle got up, looked at me and smiled, and said that he was sorry for intruding. He shook my hand and I remember my hand just disappearing in his.
And then my step father said that he had overstayed his welcome.
The principle said that he was sorry again and left.
The door closed and I wondered what had happened
I asked my mom as she got up to make dinner "why did Mr. Steiner come over?"
But she said that it was mistake and my stepfather said, "You know Johnny you are just a Sleestaxx and if you were special your daddy would have you at his house with his new wife and kids."
At that moment I knew my step father was right. If I was special I would be with my father, he would have kept me. I would not be here.
But that is as far too happy or proud as I ever get.
I can not recall anything happy about my child hood from that point on.
Just dodging the drunk and the angry mom.

Pink You Ignorant Slut!

This is total liberal celebrity crap. Let me ask you bitch what do you do for the fucking homeless?? What do you do to support the troops? What are you doing to help make the world a better place?? Yeah that is what I fucking thought! you are out to get what you can for pink and you will use what ever you can to get it! You use your celeb status to take a few fucking shots at a job that is always ridiculed by everybody. I would like to your pansy pampered ass do the job. Making the tough decisions that need to be made, I would like to see you make the decision to storm another country and disrupt their economy and then find that the old wood administration had dropped the fucking ball and you made a mistake. He admitted that there was a mistake we all know that he made the best decision based on the best data he had at the time.

What would you have done when the fuckers dropped the towers?? ' now that is not right you guys you all should stop that rough play before more people get hurt.' yeah fucking right! How about when you were given the information that some crazy person had dangerous weapons and was know to attack other countries?? 'Now Saddam you really need to find the inner child and learn to love everybody.'

Why don't you stick to making bubble gum records, and trying to look hardcore. And leave the politics to the rest of the world that really cares. You do not care, your real concern is, am I getting paid? Who is stealing from me? And when do I get to eat? when did you wake up and say 'you know what I have the cash to help out 1000+ people by donating to habitat for humanity and I will swing a hammer for a week to build a few homes.' No you meet with some people and you eat lunch and you talk shit about some people.

Now I know you worked hard to get where you are and to do the things you do and want to do. But the president asked to have the job of running the country, asked to make the toughest decisions in the country and in the worlds best interest, and we as a group said yeah go ahead. Now when the decisions are made there are the pussies that want to complain, and cash in on his job right or wrong better or worse. why don't you take your fucking pop album divide it up by the number of songs and take the "GROSS" percentage of that one song and donate that to a charity that will help the homeless, the war displaced, the hungry children of the single mothers who made bad decisions and had babies that they should have not had yet. then you and your record company can then split the remainder for the costs and royalties.....

Yeah I thought not, you fucking, greedy, bitch fucker, spit in your face, whore, duce bag, fake, wanna be human!

kasdbfpiqwbfiyqwisjbdefash aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhh
FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

P!NK - Mr. President

I hate Mondays

I hate Mondays.

I was just having a bad Monday.
Money troubles, this weekend I had some of those “Let’s fuck with the umpire cock suckers.”
I had some Starbucks zombie try to talk on the cell phone while trying to navigate a behemoth of a urban assault vehicle, all while trying to bend the laws of physics. The dumb twit tried to occupy the same location as me in the universe at the same time.
I was passed on some training that I felt I should have been given but was not because my supervisor does not think that hourly employees are of any use or benefit.
I was just in one of those “FUCK!!, FUCKING!!!, FUCK!@!!!” moods.
I decided to go to a “Ross Dress for less” store to cheer myself up.
Why Ross?? I like the smell of the fabrics, to see what’s on sale and stuff. Also they have my picture behind the counter at ‘Vicky’s’ (Victoria’s secret). Seriously, I know because I was forced to let them take it and I made them let me autograph it.
Any ways I am in the parking lot and I see front row parking, so I slam the Ranger into the parking spot and jump out.
As I get out I see a fairly decent looking older woman and she honks at me, I wave, smile and turn to go in the store.
While I am in the back of the store touching the bras and panties, this lady starts bitching about some driving and parking spots and some other bullshit. I turn and yell’ “What?? Oh Yeah? Fuck you. You fucking cunt!”
She stops mid sentence and looks like I slapped her. Everybody in the store looks at us. So I say, “Oh I am sorry that was wrong. Let us try that again. Here, you start with being a rude fucking bitch.” Pause , “ and I will tell you how to lick my balls.” I laugh and I turn to leave before the manager comes to take my picture. Because the bras and panties are in a great location, sort of tucked in the back behind some tall racks of cotton summer dresses, and I would like to come back later next week.

It is not a sport to abuse the umpires

What has happened in our culture that has made it a sport to verbally abuse umpires??
Where and what strike zone are these bones teaching our kids.
The strike zone exists where the umpire says it does as this is a judgment call
As the ball crosses any part of the fucken plate. The written strike zone reads "a strike is called if any part of the ball enters the strike zone." And this is as just below the god-damn knees to the leading arm pit as a batter was to swing at the ball.
That word "any" means a thread, a 1/4, the black, the white, if the damn ball starts above the knee and ends in the fucking dirt.
The strike zone is not a flat plane but a 3 dimensional rectangle drawn at every pitch. And your little Xerox turd copy can duck, bob, dive back and make faces all they want but the box was drawn when the stood at the plate, and if they jump out, or duck the box bigger, I am not going to penalize the pitcher because your child can't stand in the box.
I have grandpa behind me calling pitches. I have mommies taking it personal when their kid strikes out looking (not swinging at the third strike). Believe me I hate to ring a kid up more than any umpire. I as a coach hated the backwards "K". It stood for not trying, not protecting your strike zone.
Mommies talk to your coaches and your husbands about what a proper strike zone is before you start treating me like a monster out to eat little kids. If that pitcher can consistently paint the corner of the plate a double "oh" brush with a 3" freaking ball I am going to give him his strike. And you parents can act as if I am killing kittens on field all you want, the fact remains that was a strike it had been when your pitcher was throwing the goddamn ball and it is a strike now.
And when the rule says "pitcher and catcher of record" and you are visitor and you are at the top of the 1st inning. You do not have a catcher or a pitcher yet. The rule is states of record so you can not arbitrary decide that your slowest runner is now a catcher but later you change you mind and choose another player to catch. And if the tournament director says “they can” switch means “they will allow it” not that that is the correct interpretation. "They can" means “they are allowed to”. The rule literally states "of record" which means until your player has played that position he is not that position player. AND DO NOT COME UP TO ME AFTER THE GAME TO INSURE THAT I WAS INSTRUCTED ON THE RULE!! WHAT THE FUCK YOU STUPID TURD!! THEY SAID THEY WILL ALLOW IT NOTHING more than that. Then to jump up and down insisting that I was wrong AFTER the game, is just trying to have a pissing contest. So do not be offended when I ask “why are we still having this conversation” the freaking game was over. And do you realize how retarded you looked when you yelled after me as I walked away?? HA HA HA HA man did you look stupid “We know you are going to make bad calls just know the rules?” and just about every person I came into contact with after that said "what was that coaches problem?" As I always explain it as “when you are on the short side of any score you will try and find any reason why it is not your fault.”
And to the coach about the balk, yes your boy balked, he paused on his movement to third, which I deemed a feint, regardless of his lifting and turning to first, he paused it was a feint with the foot on the rubber. I may not have explained that properly and I was a bit pissed from the last game and the opposing coach had I pissed off because he made my job harder by calling balk before I did. I am trying to slow down my calls so that my calls do not have to change because of stupid kid player crap. Like dropping the ball, over running the bag