My Christmas season was quiet

My Christmas season was quiet
By Rev. john Sleestaxx
My note: There are times that I am told flat out do not post that until after the court date. Or this would be a very bad image for everyone involved.
Or the church’s contract restricts your post of that material.
After having the blood sucking vampires (not the emo Edward type) picked over this like mites pick the meat off of bones I was given the green light to post.
If you followed my twitter feed you got wind of some Christmas violence.

Self loathing mouth breathing sinners the entire lot should be placed in a large meat grinder and turned until there is no more whining and you can not tell the eyeballs from the adrenals.
I plunged head long into the fray in hopes to make it through the ordeal with only a few scars. I was not going to pick a fight and I had resolved that this year I would be more tolerant.
Incident #1
I had almost made it but then at the last hour I was hungry and in the "red zone"
I came across a kiosk type sales point I was thinking that hey my wife may enjoy a specialty gift of soap or moisturizer. You know something special to show how special she was and the sales lady bitch shoved a bar of lye soap under my nose.
I bit her hand. Plain and simple I just bit down and she screamed and I bit harder. It was funny at first I meant to bit like a lover would you know playfully on her thumb but like I said I was in the red zone and I got a holt of that hand and I bit down. There was no blood and I did not break the skin but she had to pull twice to get free.
Her sales mate ran over, and I just kept walking. Fucking bitch should not have touched me.
Incident #2
So here I was in wal-mart, I know I should not be shopping here and if I did not have a kid that wanted COD WAW I would have shopped at a mom and pop shop. I was walking by the toys and I heard little kids yelling and one crying.
If you have kids you this sound as the signal that they are 1.) Too hungry. 2.) too tired 3.) fucking screwed for the next 30 mins it takes to get them home and into bed.
I turned the corner on a long isle of toys and there was a dad type in camo tee shirt, and three kids also in camo tee shirts. One was about 2 and in the seat of the cart one was about 4 in the merchandise section of the cart and then there was the crier he was 6 and he was looking at the ceiling of the store wailing “please please”.
As I got closer I saw the dad type was pissed and ignoring the kid. And as I got 10 feet away he looked at me, got an embarrassed look on his face and bent over and grabbed the boy’s arm and shook hard. “ I told you to shut up!” I was now 6 feet away “listen you are giving me a head ache” now three feet away “this is why your dad left.” I brought my knee up into his face so fucking hard he did not even straighten out. In a 90ยบ shape he flipped back onto his back. The boy stopped with a mid scream stuck in his throat. The dad hit the floor with a wufff! And I kept walking to the electronic department. Found the glass doors open grabbed the WAW case and left to purchase the damn thing.
At the register line I end up behind dad and his kids. No one is crying, no one was yelling.
The 6 year old looked at me, looked at his dad, tugged his dad’s arm and pointed at me. The dad turned, looked at me, and smiled a nervous smile and said, “hey about back there, I just want to…” “no do not mention anything” I cut him off.
“But I want to..” he said.
“no listen it is a terrible season, the economy is pooched and the corporate fuckers are just laughing at the rest of us.” And I turned to go to another line.
“Hey you big dummy you hurt my dad.”
I turned and smiled at the boy “ho ho ho” I laughed “merry Christmas. Son merry Christmas.”

Inauguration Prayer

I wrote this months ago in case I was asked to give the inauguration prayer

Inauguration Prayer
By Rev. John Sleestaxx

The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee. - Ezekiel 25:17

Oh lord I know I am not your son Jesus but I do know I am your favorite. How much longer do I have to endure the agony of these whinny sinners?
Oh lord dear god our god on high how long do I have to temper my frustration and rage for these blasphemers and pirates of industry, these fascists of economics and slave traders of banking.
When oh dear lord will you make them pay for their sins and their transgressions on their fellow man. When dear lord will they be shown the way to my door? So that I may start them on the long painful path of retribution and penance?
I am ready lord oh dear god I am ready. I have been training my whole life for this moment this monumental beating for this baptism I know their my be some blood shed I know there will be tears of shame and joy but in the end these agents of Satan will see the light and they will be over come with the joy that your light brings and they will be repentant.
I am just saying it is time, it is time to put you humble servant, your most sharpest tool to work.
Dear god coach, put me in, I will carry this rag tag lot of mouth breathers to glory.
But I am here to open this ceremony for the new president.
The Americans have chosen their champion for the next four years.
Please lord protect this man as he fights for me, he fights for all Americans and he fights to spread Christian beliefs across the globe to the corners of the sinful world. He will be the chosen one to force these beliefs unto the unwashed masses fore their own good mind you.
Forget that I question his sexual preference (not that there is anything wrong with that). Forget that some of his beliefs ring of communism? Which is fine since Christianity will be included in these laws of man.
Please guide his hand as he signs and does not Sign the laws of man.
Guide us and him.
Temper his heart in the case we are attacked so that his head is clear when he decides how to act in regards of protecting our beloved homeland building that was built on the backs of outcasts from all walks of life.
Please keep his eye sharp ad his aim is true in regards to piloting this ship of thieves, pirates, and sinners that we call the united states of america.
Please help him separate the chafe (cheaters) from the wheat (good people of this county) when fixing the convoluted fucked up mess of this economy.
Help him beat the retards and liars of the house into remembering why the fuck they are there in the first fucking place like you help me beat the non-believers into seeing your glorious light.
Remember this is their champion their leader to which all eyes are on and all are looking for guidance and leadership.
We are preparing to do battle in your name. These blasphemers we are about to face are right now talking evil about your humble servants, Lord. We are now going to do your will, we are now going out onto the field of war and kick their asses Lord, oh yes we are going to kick their asses. We are going to beat the snot out of them. So that they will know that you are the true Lord, the righteous Lord, and because we will let them live they will know that you are a fair and kind Lord.
We now embark on a righteous path to your glory. We carry you name and strength in our hearts. We are to be victorious in your name Lord. We are to beat and stomp the shit out of our opponents, Lord. We will tattoo your name in their buttocks as we kick them down the field.
And when they have realized their loss they will be sorry they opposed you Lord they will utter pleas of forgiveness and repentance. They will ask you to take them back into your fold and let them suckle on you generosity and forgiveness.
The heathens and the unwashed have challenged your word and your will. They have stepped onto our field. They have defiled the sacred ground that was blessed by you Lord. Right now Lord they speak terrible untruths and blasphemous accusations about you humble servants. They say we are not worthy of being champions, they say you are not with us Lord. Help us to show them the path Lord, help us show them the error of their ways, let us be your muscle and your sinew. Lets us deliver your punishment to the evil that is our competition, Lord.
Let us carry your word with our strength and our hearts. Let us shine with your glory that is so bright that the evil that opposes us will be blinded. Let your voice be so loud that the sinners that are the other team be deafened from your word. Let those that came to watch your servants perform your will on this field be proud of us like you are proud of us now.
Though our win Lord, the blasphemers and the unrighteous will see you your strength and your might, and they will bow and beg forgiveness. For on this day Lord through you we will be victorious and we will be the champions you made us.

Death predictions for 2009

Death predictions for 2009

Many of you will remember the gift I was given last year. The two spirit guides Rajkumar and Izumi Sarkaio Well they were chatting up a freaking storm in my head on the first. At first I thought it was my blood rushing into my eye sockets and I contemplated jabbing a fork or a knife to stem the screaming and pain. But then I was given flashes and images and I figured out what the headache was.
It was Raj telling me who was going to die in 2009. Not just the famous ones but EVERY ONE, by name.
Man that bastard can sure talk fast.

Entertainment Celebrities

Sharron Osborne I can not say why other than her loss would be a very said story for the entire world and the other Osbornes would be expected. She has always been a ray of sunshine and hope for every person she has every been filmed talking about. So much so it makes me ill when she is voting talent off the stage. Sharron, just tell them that they suck and be done with it! Stop telling them how they could suck less.

Margot Kidder Just because it is time for her to escape and get hit by a tourist bus on the Los Angeles Express way

Brittany Spears This is just a train wreck and I am hedging my bet is all.

Lars Ulrich Just wishful thinking. (@larsulrich whine some more you foreign queer)

Rush Limbaugh It won’t be the oxycodone demons or his private fetishes that will claim him, nor will it be a car accident on a back road in Rio Linda. It will be the were-wolves that eat him alive while he trapped in his Lexus with an 18 year strawberry and a 5 year old box of Twinkies.

Jeff Conaway Have you seen this zombie? Sheesh! Maybe he will do a zombie version of Grease first. OOOOH that sounds kind of do-able. I get 2.5% of gross payable to my paypal account [].

Warren Ellis He will either swallow his own ego in his sleep and choke to death or he will swallow his own penis and choke to death I just can’t tell right now.

In Business

Warren Buffett and the sad thing is I think he knows too.

Michael Capellas Satan only gives your soul so many extensions before he comes to claim what is his.

Jeffrey K. Skilling his prison husband will catch him in another cell and toss his salad for the last time. His husband will then create many fake inmates to hide the death from prison officials.

Alan Greenspan will commit suicide. His note will read “@world LOL”

Alfonso John Romero Will be working a temp warehouse job and be crushed under a palate of PS3’s when the forklift driver is trying to get “Doom” to run on his iPhone.

Disclaimer: So I have decided to post a list of death predictions for 2009. Please note all attorneys and FBI Agent types these are for humor and entertainment only. These are in no way a threat, a promise, a plan, or a hit list. They are just predictions for entertainment purposes only.

To the Church in Philadelphia

Letters to the church from the lord #6
To the Church in Philadelphia
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

To the Church in Philadelphia

Rev 3:7 “To the angel of the church in Philadelphia write the following:

“This is the solemn pronouncement of the Holy One, the True One, who holds the key of David, who opens doors no one can shut, and shuts doors no one can open:
Rev 3:8 ‘I know your deeds. (Look! I have put in front of you an open door that no one can shut.) I know that you have little strength, but you have obeyed my word and have not denied my name.
Rev 3:9 Listen! I am going to make those people from the synagogue of Satan – who say they are Jews yet are not, but are lying – Look, I will make them come and bow down at your feet and acknowledge that I have loved you.
Rev 3:10 Because you have kept my admonition to endure steadfastly, I will also keep you from the hour of testing that is about to come on the whole world to test those who live on the earth.
Rev 3:11 I am coming soon. Hold on to what you have so that no one can take away your crown.
Rev 3:12 The one who conquers I will make a pillar in the temple of my God, and he will never depart from it. I will write on him the name of my God and the name of the city of my God (the new Jerusalem that comes down out of heaven from my God), and my new name as well.
Rev 3:13 The one who has an ear had better hear what the Spirit says to the churches.’

Do you know what he is speaking of?
Do you?
He is saying that he knows the trials and tribulations that you have been subjected too. He knows that you have been beaten and you have been persecuted. But he has rewards waiting for you because you stood strong in his word through all hell and adversity. He also has some punishment to be dealt out to the false Jews of the synagogue of Satan.

Exo 23:1
“You must not give a false report. Do not make common cause with the wicked to be a malicious witness.

Do not lie in his name, do not lie for any reason at all. Do not bring your self to the level of the persecutors and torturers of the world. Do not create strife and adversity with in the family unit. Be strong as a family as you are strong in the word of the lord.

Exo 23:7
Keep your distance from a false charge – do not kill the innocent and the righteous, for I will not justify the wicked.

There is no reason for lying. There is no reason to subjugate the weak and innocent. For no reason known to god or man is there a reason to lie cheat and steal but it happens everyday, everyday in church, everyday in academia, everyday in business and every day in the government. Can I get a witness?
Even though the world is out to crush and enslave the righteous you do not get to break the rules and laws of god. But you will be rewarded for following the rules and laws. That means when your boss brags about the great financial success of the business and then gives you no raise and tells you there just is no money to compensate. You will be rewarded. But do not steal from you boss do not lie about you time sheet and do not lie to protect your boss when he has committed a crime either.

Psa 144:11
Grab me and rescue me from the power of foreigners, who speak lies, and make false promises.

Do not fall into the trap of the global economy. Along with cheaper goods because of the averaging of COGs there is also the averaging of salaries. Also when the corporations line their pockets with profits and then take the rest and invest in the economy of the foreign nations to build their goods they are starving their cash cow.
They invest in the company but they do not invest in their local and country economies. These men are the ones that will bring about the end times and the anti-Christ will rise from them.

Pro 6:19
a false witness who pours out lies, and a person who spreads discord among family members.

Families are not just those tied by blood they are also the people you work with. They are the people that you shop with. They are the people you next too. They are the people that your children go to school with. You do not need to be gossiping, rumor-milling, and scandalizing. These are family for good or ill they are your community they are the people that you live with.
Be kind to your family. Be right with your family. Do not try and tear down your family members help and they help you. They succeed and you succeed.

Rev 20:7
Now when the thousand years are finished, Satan will be released from his prison 20:8 and will go out to deceive the nations at the four corners of the earth, Gog and Magog, to bring them together for the battle. They are as numerous as the grains of sand in the sea. 20:9 They went up on the broad plain of the earth and encircled the camp of the saints and the beloved city, but fire came down from heaven and devoured them completely. 20:10 And the devil who deceived them was thrown into the lake of fire and sulfur, where the beast and the false prophet are too, and they will be tormented there day and night forever and ever.

Dan 11:21
“Then there will arise in his place a despicable person to whom the royal honor has not been rightfully conferred. He will come on the scene in a time of prosperity and will seize the kingdom through deceit.

Gog and Magog are the kings of Asia and the land of Asia. They are the eaters of the world in the book of revelations. They will be the ones that bring the plagues upon us. I am not saying that Asians are the devil I am saying that the kings or the corporate leaders that allow lead paint to be on child toys, leaders and CEOs that allow poison to be placed in tooth paste that will be given to the poor and the people of third world countries. Do not think this a mistake. This is part of a greater plan to rid the world of the hangers-on , the ones thought to be dragging the world down. A culling of the heard so to speak is under way.
This is also part of a greater plan to have the common folk hand the control over. Look at how terrible things are look at the horrific tragedies and look what we can do to fix the problems. Look at the changes that can be made provided you give us total control over your environments. You can no longer afford housing we will provide housing. You can no longer take proper care of your children we will take care of your children. You can no longer take care of your self let us take care of you.
Think for yourself. Buy local when you can. Treat your neighbor with care and love. Treat your family with the respect they deserve, and that includes those members that are not tied with blood.
The cookies and donuts are American made and the coffee is of American roast. The single mothers support group is looking for some strong backs to help move some of the sisters to better accommodations. Also I understand that some of the single men are now dating some of the single mothers and I have preformed 2 marriages from that mix. I am glad to see that the community is getting better intertwined and interleaved this will make us stronger and make us a greater force when the time comes to beat the devil back into hell.

Speaking of hell, the Henderson's elderly mother was run down in the parking lot during an altercation over exiting the parking lot. Please, please be a little more Christian until you have exited the parking lot.