Eat the dog

The chant was so unison it was almost one voice.

 It was his first band camp.

 He wanted to make new alliances, this was to be his year, he was going to be the man, he was going to get a girlfriend AND kiss her.

 And then his parents sent him to this camp.

 Now he’s in the circle, with the whole camp chanting and watching him.

 What's this going to accomplish?

 It's a team building exercise. Now you will share in their strength and share a bond that can not be broken.

 Now it’s simple, just Eat The Dog

A New Baseball Story

I have not posted any baseball stories in a long while because they all are basically the same story; One team gets their asses handed to them and they bitch and complain the whole game until I either throw the coach out or I call ball game.

This weekend I scheduled 7 games. Seven games in one day, for those that know, 7 games is a VERY long day, more than 14 hours of baseball. Yeah, there is a 20 minute break in the schedule but rarely does a game end on time or start on time so there is no break except to turn in the score card, grab some baseballs and water head back out to the field.

 So Saturday in the 4th game the team that refused to practice and felt that the sport is played by complaining was doing their part to win. The coach asked why every ball call was not a strike. Seriously they wanted a pitch 4 balls off the plate and into the batter’s box called a strike. They wanted to know why a tie did not go to the runner.

"Com'on blue seriously that was a tie, and the tie always goes to the runner."

"No coach there is no “tie” in baseball. The word "tie" is not even in the rule book." "The rule reads 'the batter-runner must beat the ball to the base in order to be called safe'"

"Oh my god the catcher did not even move his glove."

"Yes you are right he did not and he is holding it 12 inches off the plate."

"Jesus Christ!" exclaiming as he is throwing his hat into the dirt. "I swear to god blue, you are doing this on purpose."

"Time!" I say holding up my hands. "Coach, please come here."

The coach walks over smirking to his peanut gallery bleachers, and gets 1 step too close to me, on purpose. I do not step back, I lean in 1 inch and say "Really? Who are you that I would care that much to do something like that to you?"

"I don’t know" he says "but you have not given us one call."

I smile "Given you a call? No one gives anybody a “call” in this game. In fact this game was already decided on Wednesday night with software."

"Wait what?" He steps back and blinks. "Already decided?"

"Yes sir" I hold my poker face. "Yeah it’s just like wrestling; baseball has been a scripted sport from the beginning."

"Bullshit!"

"Now hold on coach, keep it down, all sports are scripted even the Olympics. Well except high school. obviously." 

"Fuck you!" He says looking at me like I just said something about his mom.

"Now" Placing my hand on his shoulder and slightly guiding him towards his dug out. "Here’s what I am going to do, I am not going to throw you out for cussing or for behaving like a poor sport. I am telling a secret and if you do not like it, then you should go and talk to the tournament director. Tell him what I told you and tell him that I said I felt bad about you paying your tournament fees, and that he should reimburse you, because I said you were a nice guy and should not be taken advantage of like this." we ended our short walk at the gate and my partner had already opened the gate and he passed through the gate and we shut it.

The look on his face was priceless, it was a mixture of dumb ass and 'what there is no Santa?'

As we turned to get back to the game, he called after us, "Hey blue? Are you serious?"

I turned back and looked at him with the dead pan seriousness of a reporter, "Coach, is this your first game today or your second?"

He looked even more bewildered "Our first."

I made a face resembling pain, "oops you weren't supposed to lose the first game." Sucking air through my teeth and glancing at my partner who was now smiling and facing outfield, "It was supposed to be the second game; I got the whole thing screwed up. I am very sorry; really you should go talk to the tournament director. Tell him what happened, tell him I got your two games mixed up, He will know what to do. Tell him I told you he should make it right for you."

We finished the game with a run rule, 20 run difference , (23-3) after 3 innings of baseball 1 hour and 5 mins.  That gave us a break of about 25 minutes.

My partner and I went out to our cars to change and get a drink of water.

At the cars, the tournament director and the "Umpire In Charge" walk up. "Hey ahh John," The tournament director started, "what happened on your field just now?"

Squinting into the 3:00 sun "Why what do you mean?"

 The tournament director continued, "I had the craziest conversation with the East Nicolas coach. He said you told him that all the games were rigged and that he was not supposed to lose the first game but only loose the second and you made a mistake."

"Yeah" I said, "he was acting like a jerk and making the game personal, so I told him some stuff to get him off the field."

"Why would you tell him that?"

“I dunno it seemed kinda funny and it was either be funny or be a lunatic I choose funny. Did you keep him in the office?”

“Yeah, Thanks. I do not need your craziness in the office!”

“And I do not need their craziness on the field.”

“You know you have his team at the 8:00 game? “

“So?” I said, "he was ejected you have to bar him from the next game.

"well," the UIC was now smiling, "you did not eject him so I have to let be in the next game."

“Crap!” I exclaimed.

“Exactly!” They both said with big ass, stupid smiles on their faces.

Needless to say the 8:00 game was with no events, no complaining, I do not know what the coach was thinking as he watched his team win the next game. Did he think they actually won? I have no idea. The game ended 3-2 in favor of East Nicolas and I went home.

Take no shit

This weekend I umpired a state tournament. No this was not a World Series but the winner received a berth to a world series and no again, it would not be a world series that would be on ESPN.
I started the weekend by doing 9s. Aaaahh nine year olds so focused so attentive so unable to stop the ball before it hits the umpire. Dads in the back with radar guns and talking about curves and sliders and changeups.
If I have, one more dad tell me to hang with the curve I swear I will eat him with red beans and rice and wash the entire meal down with the blood of a badger.
Therefore, I have done this tourney a few times in the past few years and I know this is life and death, the winner of every game gets to decide the gas prices, someone's grandmother is held captive by ninjas and her life and the life of 500 virgins hang on the balance of this game. However, I also know that the shit has to be stopped before it gets out of hand.
I decide to approach it differently then in the past. In the past, I wait until I can no longer take the insults the jabs the drive bys and I warn a coach and then I never ever get to eject him because I keep re-drawing the line. Therefore, this year I am drawing the line at the top and hold it fast.
First chirp gets a "we are not going there today. We are not going there do I make myself clear?" I start the plate meeting with a personable pleasant attitude and humor but when they chirp I jerk the lease tight and hard. This seemed to be very effective.
My son said that he was embarrassed at one point because I came out too fast on one dad but when I asked my son if he thought the game was more enjoyable after the dad was told to keep quite. He admitted that I was right.
I did 18 games in three days I will not talk about all 18 as many went with no issue.

Game one 9s
Red vs. white
I on bases and newbie [not my son] on plate.
No one on
Screamer up third base line
I pivot but I peek at the ball as it passes third (it is foul but I hear no indication)
[I now that if I do not hear foul I am going to have a shit storm on my hands]
I watch the runner cross first and go to second I hear the shit storm thunder "what's the call blue?.....you have to make a call blue!" now there is no way to convey the anger and rage that is in this voice but trust me when I turned I expected to see this coach holding my 16 year old partner by the throat.
Runner stops I turn to handle the shit storm and there is my partner doe eyed and in full panic mode. The coach is screaming and he is not telling the coach a thing. I call time and the coach starts to come out to me. I hold the umpire hand out to him and tell him to stay there he keeps coming "No coach you will go to the dug out right now!" he stops. I offer the umpire a chance to come talk to me.
"What’s the call?"
I do not know
It is either fair or foul
What do you think?
First, I was not supposed to look, I should not make that call from first base line. You had the angle it was your ball.
Yeah I know but I do not know what to call it.
Well in this case ... what is the count?
Two Two
OK if you call it foul everybody gets to go back and the batters count does not change.
I peeked at the drive and I can say that it was foul but do not plan on that rather help all the time be ready to make a call.
OK I will call it foul.
He calls it foul and not a soul complains not one chirp.
Later in the same, there is contact and although I did not see it as I watched my play, I know it was malicious. The world is screaming at the kid the pitcher is 8 feet from the plate and the runner is trotting back to the dug out. I call time the coach again wants to yell at me I hold him at bay and I talk to my partner.
The runner is out
No pitcher dropped the ball
No the runner is out for contact
You have to decide was the contact malicious.
No, it was not
Are you sure, because my back was turned on another potential play.
Yes, it was not malicious.
Turn around and call the runner out for contact he did not exercise one of his four options.
He turns, calls the runner, the coach comes out to me you cannot turn his call over.
No, I cannot
However, you just did
No, I did not
He changed his call
However, you told him to
no I did not we discussed the rule and clearly your player failed to slide, your player failed to stop, your player failed to go around, and he clearly failed to go back, so the only discussion we had was to eject him and you or just call him out.
Is he ejected?
Are you still in this game talking to me?
He turns and goes back to the dug out.
I explain the conditions to the other coach. He wants malicious contact I tell him I cannot give him that because I did not see the play.
Why not?
Because you might have wanted that out at second too.
We did not get one at second but you might have and I would have missed it if I were watching the play at home.
OK you are right.
Thanks coach.

Game 3 nine
Me on bases
Newbie [not my son] on plate (you have to do it at some point)
He gets a fucked up convoluted play at the plate and I would have made the same call as him but the coach wants to yell and intimidate the young man. He yells, "That is horrible that is terrible that is totally UN acceptable"
I call time and I make the coach walk all the way to me at first base. I tell him that his attitude is horrible that it is a terrible example and that it is unacceptable and if he is to lose his cool one more time, I do not care the reason and how much time is left on the clock I will send him to the parking lot and then my report will ensure that he is out for the rest of the tournament.
He says that I am right and that he is sorry
I tell him that he needs to apologize to the players not me.


Game 13
White vs. blue nine
98ºF 88%H
High shoulder pitch for the third ball in a row at the top of the first half (third pitch of the game) white moans and says something.
I turn and say We Will Not Go There Today. No, we will not. Am I clear?
Five heads nod yes
An out later runner steals third catcher throws and beats the runner but the fielder is too slow to swipe a proper tag my son calls the runner safe.
A coach screams BULLSHIT!
I did not hear it
My son did and he turned and in three steps crossed from third to first base line and says to the white team "there will be no profanity on the fields at any time". The five coaches all look like whip lash victims. Here is a 16-year-old telling 30-year-old gansta/MS13 looking men to stop swearing and he does so with all the authority of a grown man. I tell you I was never so proud at that moment.
Not a word fro the rest of the inning.
At the half-blue coach comes down to warm the pitcher. “I am going to call you the no nonsense umpires"
It is too hot to deal with anything other than just baseball.
He agrees.
My son arrives at the plate
I say to him "a warning for profanity?" man that coach owes you a steak dinner." he has no idea that he should be in his car right now.
My son says he did not know which coach said it.
I said if you had tossed the manger, he would have ponies the man up right quick
Yeah you are right
Wow, he is lucky I did not hear the profanity.
The white coach walks up, apologizes, and says that he has the situation under control.
My son says I hope so because it will not be tolerated around these young men.
You are right blue I am sorry
((You know what? My son fucking rocks!))(At 16 he gets it, he has the maturity to do the things it takes to be a man. I did not I was still trying to live and stay alive)

Game 16
Green vs. Blue 13s
me at the dish
3 minutes left of playtime losing team at the plate
Coach complains about a narrow escape at home.
I hear something from his side about picking sides
In addition, he has just said, "you have to call that pitch for both sides blue"
I stop the game.
"Coach, I know that there is 3 minutes left to play and I do not care if there is 30 seconds left to play if I hear one more remark that questions my integrity of my sportsmanship I will toss you to the parking lot and then call ball game.
Do not ever question my honesty I am not here to pick a winner I am here to make the decisions the two coaches cannot.
Yes blue I am sorry.


Game 18
Championship 12s
Yellow vs. white
This game was a tightly played well-pitched game that resembled two boxers in the ring trading punches. Honest to god the first two innings had no more than 13 pitches thrown.
No runner advanced past third base, we played for 3 hours something like 8 innings, and the game ended 7-0.
How you might asked.
White’s #12 was on the mound and the coach told me he was going to sub him in this half as he only had one out left in his allowable count for the tournament, but he was going to let him pitch while his number 2 boys was warming up.
Are you?
Yes.
Yellow coach says hey coach you now he has only one out right.
Yeah I am going to leave him in for it. Thanks for reminding me.
No problem.
I start the game. The pitcher clearly walks the first batter to burn sometime.
I look to white coach to see if he wants time.
I let the yellow batter in the box and he sees three balls and then the pitcher lets one drop into the zone just enough and the batter hits it to third. Third scoops and throws to second. OUT! In addition, the second turns and throws to first for a banger. OUT!
The play could have gone the other excessively. The white coach drops to his knees. The yellow coach is calmly walking up to me. The players and the parents have no clue what just happened except a double play was made and on a bang bang. The umpire on the field has no idea either because he is going back to his position.
Yellow coach goes to me and says the pitcher has pitched too many outs. Yes, I think you may be right, get the tourney director.
The white coach is now explaining to his side what just happened. My partner hears and he just smiles.
The tourney director confirms that the double was too many outs and the white has to forfeit the game.
I told my partner that this is the first time in history that a defensive coach is pissed that an umpire called a double play.







Like A Monkey With A Handgun
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 3 December, 2007..

Also reading

With A Mouthful Of Razorblades
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 6 February, 2008..

Ejection report, bad attitudes and stinky old men. By John Sleestaxx

Ejection report, bad attitudes and stinky old men.
By John Sleestaxx


So this week-end was a real humdinger.

A pushed tournament schedule.
Rain and power pushed Friday’s games to Saturday and that pushed Saturday down.

Saturday
Red vs. blue (me at the plate)
Red coach refuses to come to the plate while we wait for him to write out his line up. He could have done that while he waited the 30 mins (damn should have thought of that at the time).
Then during the plate meeting he refuses to listen and would not even face the other coach or my self or my partner. I covered 2 of the 6 things in plate before I said "we will flip and you (blue) were here first so you get to call it.
My partner said really is that all?
Yes that is the important things and we will cover the rest when they come up.
Blue loses the flip
My partner said this is going to be a rough game
Red wants to know why
I said rough crowd rough game
My partner said we are on the clock
Red get your boys on the field and get them to work
They need to warm up
No they have got to warm up get them on the field
No we need to warm up you are running 30 mins late that is your fault
No it is not my fault and you will get them on the field
No we need to warm up
You are burning his clock too now get to work]
Red says the other coach "we will get on the field in 3 or five minutes"
No will get on the field now you have had 10 mins already
No we have not
I pull out my watch and look at it yes you have now get on the field
Some dad gets on the field for something and yells "let’s not worry about little arms lets just stay on schedule"
I say to the red coach “you are responsible for your spectators this is your one and only warning"
He gets his boys on the field.
Three pitches in and off the plate by two balls red coach says "WHAT?"
I take off my mask "and say very nicely "We are not going to go there today am I clear?"
No nod, no acknowledgement, but I know he knows
I have a thing that was taught to me in all my clinics about game management "do not let the batters stand and time the pitches while the pitcher is warming up. They are to be in the dirt circle. If you do they could get beaned by the pitcher in the box and if I let them time then I better not say a word about the intentional pitch." So I do not let them do so.
At one point the red coach asks me "why not let them cross?"
I reply "because I said so."
He wants to know "is it a rule?"
Yes it is
At what level?
USSSA to high school to college to major leagues
Really?
Yes it states that the umpire behind the plate is in charge and because I say they can't, they can't.
Oh
And now every half it are trying to get on the other side.
About the fifth inning in reds batter bunts and is in fair territory I call batter out and send everyone back
He wants to know why
I said he was in fair territory when he struck the ball it is a dead ball play no one advances
He says he knows that
Then why did you ask
I wanted to know why the batter was out
And I told you that the batter was in fair territory when he struck the ball and it is a dead play no one advances what is the problem?
No problem.
Then after the half he wants to know where his player was
I told him he was in fair territory (with out moving from my position on the side)
I know but exactly where was his foot
Ok sure I will do you a favor and I step just out side of where the box would be and in font of the plate
Ok
then he goes to the back stop where all the fucking whinny dads are and they begin to have a conversation about "he can't see balls and strikes how can he see where the foot is?" today I am fresh and full of Job and patience I let it go in retrospect or the next day I should have popped the dad on the spot.
The coach bitches and whines like a school girl about how he is never coming here for another tournament (but the babies all say the same thing but guess who you see later next month?)
Game finishes and that is Saturday

Sunday is a bitch it was 100ºF 87% humidity and every field is running late and I have commitments that evening
Blue vs. white (different blue) (me on bases [I hate the bases more work than the plate and I am not in charge])
Blue is whining about some of the pitches but too bad nothing serious and that is my partner’s problem, not mine.
A couple of pick off move that were not even close and you can hear the thunder on the horizon. I have a hungry near sighted coach. Ah Hah! Something is going to happen.
A play at second from the catcher to short not even freaking close!
Blue jumps up and screams "Jesus make a call!"
I call time and motion for the coach to come out to me (I make it a long walk too).
Coach I will not tolerate another out burst like that this is your one and only warning. Am I clear?
He nods
I am sorry I have a deaf ear I did not hear your answer
Yes
Ok then let’s finish the game.
Yes I know I am a fucker at times but you can not sit there in the fucking shade on a fucking bucket over 80' and watch me make a safe call and tell me that I am not making calls. I am making fucking calls all over the place I made calls at first and I made calls at second and I made calls at third. Safe is a call. When I am in B and C position I make calls in the out field too "catch" "no-catch"
Make a call indeed! Harumpff bastard coach whose breath smells of ass!

Red vs. green (different red) (me at the plate)
Plate is nice and crisp but I smell shit in the air.
Greens second batter is rung up on an outside pitch clearly a strike be he just fucking froze. He bangs the plate and yells "that was not a strike!"
I call time and I approach the coach "that player is now on warning for sportsmanship conduct another out burst and I will eject him"
Yes sir that was not tolerable and we will fix it ASAP
Thank you
Top of two the pitcher throws 3 balls off the plate (as far off the plate as three balls) the catcher is signaling they are strikes. On the fourth that was a high pitch at the damn freaking shoulder the parents become a choir.
On the second walk they break into a rendition "oh my god" "that is terrible" "he is horrible pick" "a damn strike zone" it is an eruption of wailing to their pagan baseball gods.
I call time I approach red's coach
Sir you are responsible for your spectators this is your warning and you will not get another do you understand.
No I do not
Well let me explain it to you then
You are responsible for your players your coaches and your spectators. Your spectators are not behaving in a sportsman like manner that is expected from the stands as well in the dug out.
But they are fans I have no control
Then you better because I will eject you for them
You can not do that
You are now just arguing with me, go to the parking lot!
What you can not do that

Which ones
I turn and with out really looking that one and that one
Why them
Because I was asked to pick and they were closest to the parking lot
I can not do that
Ok let me make it easier for you then. You and a player. you want to pick or no let me, you number one....
I will go
I turn go back to the plate I hold the game until I saw him walk past the backstop.
the tournament director came up shortly and asked what is happening
I explain the the stands were arguing balls and strikes I gave the coach a warning he began to argue with me I sent him to the parking lot and he argues soem more so I began to pick players to be ejected.
did you eject a player
No not yet but if it keeps up I will
At this point some old stinky man walked up and began to yell at me. I went back to my game.
The reds catcher began rolling his eyes on every ball call and on every play that was safe he would yell "of course they are not going to call that". (You know here I thought I was being nice)I finally bent down and told the catcher that he better not say any more like that because he can be replaced. (I could have talked to the coach and just gave him his warning right then but I was meaning to give the catcher two this one and then the one to the coach if it continued) But this was clearly a mistake on my part. I should have just replaced the catcher from the top of remarks and been done with it.
Red loses and I am baked. I am fucking down. I lost my 3:30 game because of all the games running late (they gave the game to someone else)
I am at my car getting undressed and the red team is passing through the parking lot and stinky comes shuffling through
"That was the worst game ever"
Thank you. Have a nice day sir
He begins to walk towards telling about how terrible I was.
Sir does not come any closer
Do not step any closer
I reached for my phone
I am going to call the police if you come any closer
He stopped when I put the phone to my ear
You said you were going to eject the catcher to get into his head he said.
No that is not what was said.
Trailing cries of anguish as I explain to dispatch that I no longer was in need of a police officer.
Yes ma'am I am ok there is no danger. I am an umpire and I thought I was going to have trouble with a fan but he has decided to depart. Sorry to have bothered you. Yes I am sure.
They called back. LOL no ma'am everything is all right.

You know if they would just enforce day care for the parents and mandate coaching classes for the managers my life would be easier and I would probably get paid less. Oh well
Happy day it is Monday and I am still alive.







Like A Monkey With A Handgun
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 3 December, 2007..

Also reading

With A Mouthful Of Razorblades
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 6 February, 2008..

Ejection Report

Coach pitch 7:30 game
Red vs White
Game start was 7:39
partner on plate
Top of 4th 1 out runner on second
Vistors 9
Home 3
Ball was hit hard down 3rd base line
partner calls foul coaches run the players regardless
Runner on second crosses home and partner is still calling foul.
Red coach comes running down first base line yelling and waving his arms "Who called foul?" "Who called foul?" (Coach had been hostile and challenging through out the game).
partner indicates she called foul and he yelled some more and began to get into partner’s face.
I stepped up and the coach yelled at me "How can she call foul?"
I replied “Because the ball was fielded in foul territory”
He yelled and I told him to calm down
He yelled and I told him to stop yelling at me
He yelled and I told him this was his last warning
He yelled and I told him that he was to leave the game and that he was done.
He yelled some more and then he tried to stay in the dugout and yell some more.
I told him that he was to go to the parking lot.

Ejection Report

Coach pitch 7:30 game
Red vs White
Game start was 7:39
partner on plate
Top of 4th 1 out runner on second
Vistors 9
Home 3
Ball was hit hard down 3rd base line
partner calls foul coaches run the players regardless
Runner on second crosses home and partner is still calling foul.
Red coach comes running down first base line yelling and waving his arms "Who called foul?" "Who called foul?" (Coach had been hostile and challenging through out the game).
partner indicates she called foul and he yelled some more and began to get into partner’s face.
I stepped up and the coach yelled at me "How can she call foul?"
I replied “Because the ball was fielded in foul territory”
He yelled and I told him to calm down
He yelled and I told him to stop yelling at me
He yelled and I told him this was his last warning
He yelled and I told him that he was to leave the game and that he was done.
He yelled some more and then he tried to stay in the dugout and yell some more.
I told him that he was to go to the parking lot.

You can not do what i do

I am calling this post;
If you can not do what I do, do not try to tell me how to do it.

My life is a dead corpse and I am exposed naked flesh of my mothers sins and father transgressions.
My torture is the ropes of my past pressed into my throat and my genitals are stuffed into my mouth.
My tears are acid on my cheeks cutting through the dirt of my failures.
My screams are the thunderous laughter of a sitcom laugh track being played over the actions of my enemies stabbing me in the back.
My world is lit with demon fire spot lighting my fears.
My failures are graffiti on the walls for the world to see.


Other notes of my past week
Baseball everyday last week except one day of softball. I can not remember a single incident to mention.
This week end I did 13 games
Friday no issues
Saturday two in the morn with my son
I double plated for him as he felt under the weather.
When we were done he commented on how well I ran the games and that my zone was rock solid
Then I had two 14's
Good games. But I was a prick and did not mean to be. (For once can you believe it?)
I had a banger at first from "C" I rang the boy up for the third out.
The coach came to me and asked if he could appeal that call
Without meaning to I chuckled and said "absolutely not I saw that play all the way in and it was my call"
He turns and shoots a drive by I felt the foot was pulled hats all.
I think about what I said and how I sounded and asked my partner "was I just a prick?"
Well you sounded cocky
Shit that was not what I meant at all
Should I go talk to the coach about it?
naw it is too late he can just stew on it but this is how you should have approached it. And he instructed me on the proper conversation
Then I close the day with 2 more games with my son
Again I had a banger at 1st from "C" but this time I was out of angle but the ball got there first punched the ticket
1st base coach called time I looked and him he asked the right way " hey blue can you get some help on that because the foot was off the bag and your partner may have seen it better from his angle."
I turn and there is the other coach trying to chew on my partner.
Coach get to your box now. it is my call But but
No, coach go back to your place
He began to argue and I started to turn I was going to drop the whole thing right there.
He left to his box
I ask my partner was the foot off or on?
it was off
shit shit shit this is going to suck!
yeah I know
are you sure?
yes I am sure it is going to suck
I smile
Ok then here comes the shit storm
I turn "runner is safe get the team back on the field.
Screams and yells and crying and yelling
The defensive coach starts to yell at my partner
I step up
Coach that is my call talk to me
How can you let him over turn that
That is not the way to do that
No coach he did not over turn anything
Yes he did
No I was asked the correct way if I could get some help since I was angled out and may have missed the pulled foot.
I asked for another angle I got some input and I changed my call
Now get your team on the field
he starts "you know I have played pro ball for eight years and umpired too and you guys always seem to screw this up"
This conversation is over get your team on the field and get in the dugout I turn
The team piles back on and the coach asks for a warm up for his pitcher
No he does not need one.
What why not
Because I said so
After a run scores they get the third out.
I walk up to my partner as the coach is chewing on my partner
I start to explain again and gets quippy with my tone gets loud (bad thing)
Why are you yelling at me
I am not yelling I talking louder because you are not listening
Yes I am
No you are not. Because I said this conversation is over and you are still trying to talk about this
I am talking to your partner about the play
While I am here to talk to him and you are looking at me as you talk that means you are talking to me about something I told you was over. See you do not listen
I stand there looking at him not saying a word he finally walks away.
My partner said you know you interrupted me as I was bout to eject him
Oh man I am sorry shit your first ejection I took it away from you I am so sorry really I feel real bad
That’s ok let me handle my game my way.
Yes you are right I am sorry
I stayed out after that.
Then I was on the plate for the last game of the day and I had contact at the plate I deemed non-malicious but he was out
The defense wanted an ejection
I told it was not malicious and that the boy was attempting to slid. he was going down head first with his hands out looking at the ground, his hands never
Made contact with the catcher but they did collide
Coach yelled at me about how a slide works I just look at him blankly
Then I saw coach I know what a feet first slide is and what it looks like but I do not know why you are screaming at me about something I have already ruled on.
Now go back to the dug out and never approach me like this again.
I turned and went back to the plate.
Sunday
14s
I got many compliments about my zone from both sides.
My partners all said I could have gotten a little wider but in all I was rock solid.
My last 14yo game
Green was losing by a huge number and it was down to the last 12 minutes
Dribbler to short
Short scoops and throws late (he double pumped) but it gets there in time and the runner throws his shoulder into the first basemen knocking him down
I point that is malicious and the runner is ejected just as my partner is doing the same
The coach comes to me
Are you really ejecting my player?
Yes
\ This late in the game
Yes I do not want to see him on the field or in your dugout.
But that was not malicious the fielder was covering the bag
No coach your player had an avenue to the bag that did not require throwing his shoulder into the basemen and you know it
So he is ejected?
Yes coach he is ejected.
We finish the game and green loses.
I close the day on an 11AAA consolation game with a team that ate my lunch last year
And the only thing they could chirp about was a third strike that may have been dropped
I was obstructed and I looked at my partner for indication I got none so let them start the throw to first
My partner calls the batter out that the strike was caught and A fucker dad yells well he was not saying anything
I turn with a big smile on my face to him (He was outside but I talked to him anyways) your catcher blocked my view so that made the call my partners call and I do not have to make that call if the catcher blocks my view.
Everyone laughed at the dad and the frankness of the whole exchange like yeah you know that!
Not another peep from fucker
the game came down to 9 to 0 at the top of 4 visitor still can not score so now at bottom of 4 we get a walk and he steals second a bad throw puts him on his way to third and a pass ball puts the ball into the dugout fence it rattles about by the fence and touches a non player standing out side of the dug out.
Dead ball runner goes home ball game
The coaches all knew that was the right call and they just said "line up"
That was my horribly slow and boring weekend
I know I am late with another review but I was working till 10:30 every night last week and this week too.

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

The Next Hitler

Cwtstraydog: Have you got the papers I sent?
RevJSleestaxx: yes. why can i not post sermons?
Cwtstraydog: Yeah I saw that you posted “Gluttony”.
RevJSleestaxx: i was in a sharign mood and i was pissed they were taking so long to make an offer.
RevJSleestaxx: >sharing<
Cwtstraydog: Because the people looking to buy Razorblades says that it must contain unpublished material. They also do not like you calling coaches idiots.
RevJSleestaxx: that is too bad because i would rather starve than be censored!
Cwtstraydog: I understand and i told them that, that is why i have not torched your baseball posts.
Cwtstraydog: I am going to be the next Hitler. I am going to kill all the jews and 1 clown.
RevJSleestaxx: why the clown??
Cwtstraydog: See no one cares about the jews.
RevJSleestaxx: ROFLMAO. we both need a good ass whopping for that laugh!
Cwtstraydog: LOL

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

9A Rec baseball

Two games one by my self. i should have thought about it and left the plate shoes at the car and just worn the field shoes they are much lighter.
I had someone passing by at the end of the first game and jump on to help me out. Thanks!
9A what can i say the pitches were either right there or they were not.
At one point i had R3 and a ball four walk. batter-runner trots up to first and then breaks to second.
the defensive coach calls time. I grant. he asks "thought that was a ball four walk"
it was
then i am kind of wondering why the runner is standing on second base.
Because he stole second
oh, can he do that?
If he could not i would have sent him back.
Oh Ok then
we play and the game finishes no-one is hurt and no-one is too made.
i am again asked about the second base steal i explain it to him and that is is
second game had not a thing to note and i was sharp and my timing was awesome!

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

8AA Coach pitch

1 game
I was sloppy i did not like my game at all.
Coach pitching is a pitcher not a coach but i let him act the part of a coach.
my outs were good and my safes were crap.
I lost the count once and may have kicked a call at 2nd base. it was a banger and i called safe. thinking back i should have called out because the little hop off the bag may not have been off the bag at all.
These are the little things that just eat my lunch for days afterwards.
especially when it looks like the coach was managing me fuck fuck fuck.
The pitcher coach came to me calling interference as i was watching the ball in the outfield. then said do not call it is ok.
then began to complain about the boy on the bag blocking the bag. i told the coach that i was working hard for him and that if there was obstruction i would see it.
the coach from the other team came to me and asked about the conversation i told him the coach was saying that there was interference at third but i was making sure the ball was a catch/no catch. and before i could finish the statement the coach asked for time to talk to his baseman. i said yes i gave 30 seconds and then told him we were ready to play he made a drive by comment about rushing him off the field.
I told him he asked for time i gave him plenty of time and to get off the field.
I should have told the coach complaining about interference to keep mum and that he was just a pitcher.
These things just tear me up.

I do charity some times

So I do charity events damn near all weekend. (Umpire for free)
Friday a fundraiser for the high school fun and nothing really to mention
Saturday was pay at the plate and that was nice 110 for 5hours
Sunday was a toy for tots drive. The teams all bring toys and they get to playa tourney.

Saturday 14 girls fast pitch. I was awesome.
I covered third and my partner was slow to get to home almost blew it.
I pooched a first base safe call and knew it. First was bobbling the ball as the runner crossed the bag. I came up to fast with the call and I knew it.
They asked for the appeal and I gave it to them my partner knew I needed the bail. I changed my call
I lost count once and I missed 3 pitches total for the whole game.

Sunday
I do 10s behind the mound. The strike zone is weird from back there. And when the sun is in your eyes it is worse.
At the start I was told that a kid has to fall off the mound to get a balk.
This is a good time for the coaches to pitch the other boys.
So there was some balks but I did not call them ( I was told they have to drop the ball of fall off the mound to get a balk).
My last game was 12s behind the mound. They thanked me for my time and they thanked me for wearing the Santa hat and they thought that was a nice touch.
White vs. blue.
The sun was in the batters eyes so I tightened the zone a bit.
Whites pitcher was throwing inside 2 balls wide and I would call a ball. then the pitcher would mutter under his breath "come on blue".
The bitching started and a dad yells “that was a curve ball blue haven’t you seen a curve ball before.”
I yell “the ball still has to cross the plate to work.”
More retarded comments form both sides and then the half.
I stand on the offensive side and curve ball dad says "you got to hang with the curve" meaning that he felt I was giving up on the pitch too soon.
“No sir I am here as a volunteer and if you think you are better then maybe you should get out here in my stead.”
“I would love to.”
“Then you should not be so rude and disrespectful.”
He does not move and then says “you got to help the pitcher out some.
You got to hang with the curve ball.”
“No I have had enough of your mouth you sir are done no more you are rude and disrespectful”
“But I was....”
I turn to a coach from his team and tell the coach,
“I have had enough of his rude mouth. any more at all you and him will be in the parking lot charity or not and there is still an hour 10 minutes left to play. “
“do we understand?”
“yes “
Now I was loud enough for everyone to here and everyone knew I had enough
Blue coach said we are just joking with you, you know for fun, keeps you on your toes.
No sir that is not right. I get paid for the abuse and I am not getting paid today.
The white coach later apologizes and says he realizes that I am volunteering and he is sorry for the dad.
“No that is fine the issue is behind us now and the warning stands.”
The score is now blue 8 white 1 bottom of five with 6 minutes left to go.
Two outs and Flair to left gets a boy from blue on base.
Boy steals to second then to third.
Pitcher is trying to hold the boy on but the boy is too quick back to the bag.
The pitch steps to set and starts his motion and I see his foot 13 inches off the rubber.
“That’s a balk“
I balked the winning run into home to finish the game 3 minutes early.

Umpiring and the lord By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

THE FOX AND THE GRAPES By Aesop

A hungry Fox saw some fine bunches of Grapes hanging from a vine that was trained along a high trellis, and did his best to reach them by jumping as high as he could into the air. But it was all in vain, for they were just out of reach: so he gave up trying, and walked away with an air of dignity and unconcern, remarking, "I thought those Grapes were ripe, but I see now they are quite sour."

Our society is falling apart. We are generating legions of whiners and cry babies. Our children are learning that it is better to blame someone for their failures than to accept that some fucking work needs to be done to accomplish anything.

Mark 16:16 The one who believes and is baptized will be saved, but the one who does not believe will be condemned. 16:17 These signs will accompany those who believe: In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new languages; 16:18 they will pick up snakes with their hands, and whatever poison they drink will not harm them; they will place their hands on the sick and they will be well.”

I umpired eleven softball games this weekend. I step onto the field knowing that there will be a sinner that hates me and a coach that loves me. This I know. I will never make a call that both teams will like. From the first outside pitch that I did not see over the plate to the check swing that I called a swing I had this fucking asshole on my back.

Psa 57:4 I am surrounded by lions; I lie down among those who want to devour me; men whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are a sharp sword.

Rev 9:8 They had hair like women’s hair, and their teeth were like lions’ teeth.

They say terrible terrible things. They attack my character. They attack my integrity they say mean hurtful things. Why do they do that, because they have to blame someone for their short comings and failures?

They are failing and they can not say "I met someone that plays better than me." They accuse me of conspiring and they say I have picked a favorite when I walked onto the field.

2Pe 2:13 suffering harm as the wages for their harmful ways. By considering it a pleasure to carouse in broad daylight, they are stains and blemishes, indulging in their deceitful pleasures when they feast together with you.

In reality I do not even think about which team is at bat and which team is ahead. My focus is on the zone. Or my focus is on the feet and hands and the ball.

That is all I do, not even know which coach is bitching half the time. But..........

But..........

Sometimes one fucker gets up under my skin and festers too fast for even the lord to give me patients. These are the worst of the worst these are the ones that came onto the field looking for a reason to bitch at me. I almost can tell you at the plate meeting who the fucker is going to be.

Tit 3:11 You know that such a person is twisted by sin and is conscious of it himself.

Gen 37:26 Then Judah said to his brothers, “What profit is there if we kill our brother and cover up his blood?

And I will say, Yes I am able to make a mistake now and again. I even know when I made the mistake and I try to correct it.
I was at the plate and it was long day. And their girl could not put the ball over the plate no matter how hard {{I}} Tried to see the outside corner she was not there.

Luk 8:14 As for the seed that fell among thorns, these are the ones who hear, but as they go on their way they are choked by the worries and riches and pleasures of life, and their fruit does not mature.

The coach was whining and bitching something fierce. At one point he stepped up to pretended to clean his shoes and said that my strike zone sucked.
I smiled as nice as I could and said "OK if you say so"

He said "I do say so".

I said "Aright then let us continue the game."

He said "No blue your zone is terrible"

OK.

No REAL BAAAAAAD

So you want to forfeit and not continue the game?

I did not say that.

Well actually you did. You see I said lets continue the game and you said no blue your zone is terrible.
That was not what I meant.
I am sorry but you need to get into the dug out cause we are about to start the next inning

Psa 43:1 Vindicate me, O God! Fight for me against an ungodly nation! Deliver me from deceitful and evil men!

Some more grousing, chirping, bitchin’, and crying.
He the bitchy coach walks up and asks where was the first strike?
Where is this conversation going?
Just tell me where the first strike was...down the middle?
Yeah sure where is the point of this conversation?
you do not know
No I do not understand the point of the conversation so it the conversation is over.
He goes and begins to make a production of telling everybody I do not remember the last 20 pitches in order and he does.

Pro 30:31 a strutting rooster, a male goat, and a king with his army around him.

Pro 12:5 The plans of the righteous are just; the counsels of the wicked are deceitful.

Finally I here "he sucks"
I call time and I motion for the coach to step over to me.
I say "Coach to stop being a dummy head."
He looks at me and says what?
Coach you are making as dummy head of your self and you are embarrassing your team because of your retarded act. Stop it now or you will be in the parking lot blue there is only 10 minutes left.
No you do not understand. I was told not to throw anybody out. So if I do, you had to have been a real ass. And I will make sure that the director knows what an ass you were.
You can not do that!
Yes I can and I have twice before.
I am not saying that I am special and I carry any special power I am just saying that if I toss a coach today it means that that coach was way too out of control. Every umpire scheduler knows that I am too nice and I am too easy when it comes to tossing.
Do I make my self clear?
Yes sir.

Psa 35:17 O Lord, how long are you going to just stand there and watch this? Rescue me from their destructive attacks; guard my life from the young lions

Then on another game I had an obstruction call. batter runner reaches first base and bumps into the first baseman and drops down a bit. I noticed that the first baseman has been forcing a wide turn by stepping into the track of the runner.
I throw out the delayed dead ball and protect the runner to second.
The defensive coach calls time and comes out.
Are you telling me that you think the runner would have been safe had she not collided with first baseman?
Yeah sure that is what I am saying.
There is no way she would have made it to the base.
Uh OK
She would not have made it!
Uh Ok but my call stands.
No she would not have made it!
Uh ok.
I want to talk to your partner.
Uh OK. (Long pause as he turns and takes a step) But it is my call and I am not asking for any help.
He is crushed. And slumps
That is a terrible call to be making this late in the game

Well sir had there been contact sooner the call would have been made sooner.

Rev 9:17 Now this is what the horses and their riders looked like in my vision: The riders had breastplates that were fiery red, dark blue, and sulfurous yellow in color. The heads of the horses looked like lions’ heads, and fire, smoke, and sulfur came out of their mouths.
I am in the parking lot changing between games from plate to field. Two more games.
And a dad passes by.

You suck as a umpire and he keeps going. Like a drive by.
Really? You suck as a woman.
He stops and turns.
I am not a woman!
Oh really? Then I guess you just suck! Have a nice day.
What is your name?
Reverend John Sleestaxx. And I extend my hand
He ignores my offer to shake hands.
I am going to tell the director what you said.
Ok but when the director hears how you made a personal comment you will be run out for the reminder of the tournament.
No I won't
Yes you will.
You sir are not allowed to make personal attacks on any official. It is stated in every rule book of every sport.
It is not! Yes it is it is followed by sportsmanship conduct being the judgment of the official and the official being the final say at any point during the game.
The director's name is Robert Schmidt. And he can be found right over there and I indicate the tournament table at the park entrance. I can take over there right now if you like and introduce him to you.
No you mind your own business.
And you have a nice day Dad!
What a cock sucker!
Anyway I go to my last and the game is close. We are the last game to play the fields are empty and the UIC and Tourney director are watching my game. I thought this was a good game for me and I did not hear any complaining. The time limit expired but visitor was up by one point after the third out.
The coaches start talking and they approach me and my partner.
Hey I know the time has expired but we really want to complete the game.
Can we pay you for some extra time?
My partner and I look at each other.
I turn and I say you can keep anything you were going to pay me it is for one half innings and I will do it by myself if my partner needs to go.
He says he does but he will stay for one half innings.
So I volunteer 20 minutes of my time for free so that these girls can play some more ball.
But I suck as an umpire and I am stupid.
The game ends with visitor holding their lead.
One my way home I stop at a store to get a soda.
In line behind me I hear hey blue you sucked today.
I turn and see a coach from earlier. No coach I did not suck! You failed to teach your team to execute and win you sir sucked as a coach and you want to blame it on me.
He stepped up and start to say something and I head butted him in the forehead his head snapped back and he fell back.
Everyone looked at me
And I will have this candy bar too.
I paid and left as they began to help the old fuck head up. Oh yeah he was like 50 years old.
The lesson here is take action.
Take responsibility for your future.
Take control of your game.
Play hard
Play right
And take no shit from old fuckers in the corner store.

The teen ministries will have an exhibition match in the teen center. it seems that there is a grudge match that needs to be played out since the boys lost to the girls a few weeks ago.
Shannon Lark will be refereeing the match and also providing the mid-match entertainment. 'Shannon you did bring your grinder right?'
The single mothers group would like to ask that some of the men who helped last month provide some contact information as they are needed for more assistance. There is a woman who is in need of a new roof. I know that there are enough strong backs that a new roof could be raised in a weekend.
Let us show up and show our support and help this family member out.
Drive carefully in the parking lot and remember not to honk as I will be out there with rocks.
Ecc 3:5
A time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones; a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;

Go in peace and keep your pimp hand strong.

A couple games last night

You know when I umpire I looked like an asshole. I do not mean to look like an asshole. But there you go I am an asshole on the field that is just because if look like the nice guy I am the coaches all get outta hand real quick.
In my plate meeting I finish with;
"If there is a play on the field and you want to talk about the play, let the play finish wait for the call, ask for time, wait for time to be granted, approach the official that made the call and we can have a positive discussion. I expect sportsmanship from both sides. Any questions"
We started with some jokes about some other umpires being bad and that they maybe friends of mine and I said since I becomes an umpire I have no friends. Do not feel bad for me though this is good. I save allot of money on alcohol and food when I have people over for a party.
I told them I was alone on the field and that I would be making all the calls tonight. They said that was ok.
I said well because we all have no choice in the matter (I am an asshole).
Game is good second batter up makes a close double into a close triple causing me to run the field.
I look good I am in position at all times.
Boy tryst to steal second, good idea with on umpire, the catcher gets the ball there first and the runner slides into the tag. The glove with the ball is under the knees of the runner.
I call "show me the ball" the short stop pulls the glove out and the ball flees outta his mitt. "Safe"
The usual chirping about the balls and strikes actually the balls the strikes were quite.
At the bottom of the 4th the batter chips the ball into the ground in front of the plate.
It is now like a bunt and barely rolls up the third base side with a loose runner on third.
The ball spins on the line -ON THE LINE- a 2 and half inch ball is spinning like a top on a 2 inch line. Catcher and pitcher hover. Ball stops and they look at me. My right arm shoots out pitcher picks the ball up looks back and throws to the base but the batter is on base by 3 steps. Runner on third comes in on the throw to first and scores.
Coach calls time.
I expect a talk about the line.
He says "the ball came off the batters toe when he was in the box"
"No it did not"
"Uh YES it did" like duh big red truck tone.
"No it did not"
"Yes it did"
"No coach the call is mine not yours the ball did not touch the batter"
"Yes it did"
"I did not see contact therefore contact did not occur"
"Yes it did”
"You know what this conversation is over"
"You said we would have a positive conversation"
"And the conversation was positive until you said I was wrong"
"I never raised my voice"
"Neither have I yet"
"Now again this conversation is over and this is your warning."
"My warning there was contact and ..."
"Now coach I have stated that this conversation is over AND I have given you your warning
This is your second and last."
He walks away and mutters.
What should have occurred was "coach what the hell you want me to do? Appeal? Come on I 1 umpire doing 1 man mechanics and you want to try and bust my balls on a bullshit call like that fuck you! And tell that loud mouth fucking mom to shut the hell up. She can not see the fucking plate from there so can not tell little Donny that the pitch was a strike. Fuck off and here let me help you to the dugout with a swift kick to the ass."

I remember a time when I liked the game of baseball
The smell of wet grass, the throwing the ball with my son, the "anything can happen" feeling, the thought of how happy and proud my son is when he completes a well played game. Man the great life lessons he is learning.
I was probably the only parent that rooted for the team until the umpire called ball game.
I remember coaching and I remember the umpires and I never argued with the umpires. I knew they were not there to get me but to get the game right. Today coaches watch the sports highlights and think that the umpires are there to abuse. The kids learn that the umpires are blind, stupid, they suck and they are worthless. They could not make a call to save their lives, and the team must not only beat the other team but they must beat the umpires too.
Man these fucking parents and coaches are way the fuck outta control.
FUCK YOU!
The second game was good until a coach asked for time and then asked about my strike zone. I told him that the strike zone is not up for discussion, but are they outside?
You know what coach I will give you a free one. They are outside just as I have motioned through out the game.
But...
No coach a free one does not mean that you can ask another question.
He moves his catcher and wow strike. the kid already has a smoking fast ball and the other team is basically a rec team he could finish the game with 9 pitch innings and we could go home early but know you and that loudmouth bitchy mom gotta play like it is the world fucking series.
BLA BLA BLA BLA
FUCK YOU
FUCK YOU FUCK YOU!

It is not a sport to abuse the umpires

What has happened in our culture that has made it a sport to verbally abuse umpires??
Where and what strike zone are these bones teaching our kids.
The strike zone exists where the umpire says it does as this is a judgment call
As the ball crosses any part of the fucken plate. The written strike zone reads "a strike is called if any part of the ball enters the strike zone." And this is as just below the god-damn knees to the leading arm pit as a batter was to swing at the ball.
That word "any" means a thread, a 1/4, the black, the white, if the damn ball starts above the knee and ends in the fucking dirt.
The strike zone is not a flat plane but a 3 dimensional rectangle drawn at every pitch. And your little Xerox turd copy can duck, bob, dive back and make faces all they want but the box was drawn when the stood at the plate, and if they jump out, or duck the box bigger, I am not going to penalize the pitcher because your child can't stand in the box.
I have grandpa behind me calling pitches. I have mommies taking it personal when their kid strikes out looking (not swinging at the third strike). Believe me I hate to ring a kid up more than any umpire. I as a coach hated the backwards "K". It stood for not trying, not protecting your strike zone.
Mommies talk to your coaches and your husbands about what a proper strike zone is before you start treating me like a monster out to eat little kids. If that pitcher can consistently paint the corner of the plate a double "oh" brush with a 3" freaking ball I am going to give him his strike. And you parents can act as if I am killing kittens on field all you want, the fact remains that was a strike it had been when your pitcher was throwing the goddamn ball and it is a strike now.
And when the rule says "pitcher and catcher of record" and you are visitor and you are at the top of the 1st inning. You do not have a catcher or a pitcher yet. The rule is states of record so you can not arbitrary decide that your slowest runner is now a catcher but later you change you mind and choose another player to catch. And if the tournament director says “they can” switch means “they will allow it” not that that is the correct interpretation. "They can" means “they are allowed to”. The rule literally states "of record" which means until your player has played that position he is not that position player. AND DO NOT COME UP TO ME AFTER THE GAME TO INSURE THAT I WAS INSTRUCTED ON THE RULE!! WHAT THE FUCK YOU STUPID TURD!! THEY SAID THEY WILL ALLOW IT NOTHING more than that. Then to jump up and down insisting that I was wrong AFTER the game, is just trying to have a pissing contest. So do not be offended when I ask “why are we still having this conversation” the freaking game was over. And do you realize how retarded you looked when you yelled after me as I walked away?? HA HA HA HA man did you look stupid “We know you are going to make bad calls just know the rules?” and just about every person I came into contact with after that said "what was that coaches problem?" As I always explain it as “when you are on the short side of any score you will try and find any reason why it is not your fault.”
And to the coach about the balk, yes your boy balked, he paused on his movement to third, which I deemed a feint, regardless of his lifting and turning to first, he paused it was a feint with the foot on the rubber. I may not have explained that properly and I was a bit pissed from the last game and the opposing coach had I pissed off because he made my job harder by calling balk before I did. I am trying to slow down my calls so that my calls do not have to change because of stupid kid player crap. Like dropping the ball, over running the bag