By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Mar 7:22 adultery, greed, evil, deceit, debauchery, envy, slander, pride, and folly.
Today I am going to tell a story and talk about Wrath.
I know that many of you are wonder how is Reverend John going to cover this one when he is out beating he god lord in top the morons and sinners of the world?
How is the good reverend going to talk about wrath when he has talked about the glory of the lord's anger and the truth behind our own anger?
Wrath is not just anger or hatred but vengeful violence or the impatience of justice and the taking of equalization into ones own hands.
Wrath is about the uncontrolled anger that is the drive to obtain instant retribution of instant justice. It is the impatience to wait for proper judgment.
Wrath is the love of justice perverted, perverted to the point of revenge and spitefulness.
It is like the time that I beat a bully up once.
I beat him so hard and so fast that he never saw what or how was beating him. He just knew that 15 minutes later he was a mess.
I have atoned for that sin and I make sure that I do not commit that sin from now on.
Wicked plans of revenge and vindication are signs of wrath.
This week begin close to Christmas and I needing to do some shopping I went to the mall. While I was shopping I see this man yelling at a clerk in Williams and Sonoma. Have any of you all been in the place?? Man the smell of chocolate is heavenly and there is no way you can go in that store and be mad at the same time. I step in and say sir you really need to calm the fuck down. There is no need to yell at that clerk.
You need to mind your own business bible thumper and he shoved me away.
He then turned to the clerk and slapped them again and said your store lies and you lied.
I stepped back into the store and tell the clerk you should step away for this person as they are out of control and need to be dealt with.
He walks up into striking distance and I wallop him before he can say a word, before he can raise his fist.
I may have committed a sin and I would have to answer for that.
But he pissed me off and I used my rage in a completely unconstructive nay completely destructive way.
I used the anger and power the lord gave me and I apologized to him immediately.
Then I thought I saw the flicker of something in the man's eyes when he took the blow, I thought that maybe I saw Satan behind those eyes. And this shopper was not so quick to get control and he began to beat on the poor clerk. Man this fucker was out of control real fast. I realized immediately that this man was possessed by the demon Satan and had to do something fast. Satan is the demon whose domain is wrath.
I reached into one of my shopping bags and grabbed my bible and the bottle of water I was drinking.
There was a crowd had beginning to gather at the scene.
I opened my bible to Luke and I recited;
Luk 4:31-35 So he went down to Capernaum, a town in Galilee, and on the Sabbath he began to teach the people. They were amazed at his teaching, because he spoke with authority. Now in the synagogue there was a man who had the spirit of an unclean demon, and he cried out with a loud voice, “Ha! Leave us alone, Jesus the Nazarene! Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are – the Holy One of God.” But Jesus rebuked him: “Silence! Come out of him!” Then, after the demon threw the man down in their midst, he came out of him without hurting him.
And I brought the water bottle down on his head 7 times.
I yelled "Satan! Get out of that man now!" stop this wrathful beating as I cast you to the pits of hell that you came from you vile evil beast.
Satan be gone! As I am going to anoint you with the Holy Spirit! And I brought the bottle of water down upon his head again.
A guttural scream of agony bellowed from the man and he stopped beating on the clerk that was trying to resolve his issue. He spun and looked at me his eyes glowing; a woman screamed in fear and fainted. He stepped to me and I brought my bible a crossed his face.
His head snapped to one side and he spit out three teeth.
Shit this guy is going to be pissed at me when this is over.
That is right when this is over for I was not about to stop now and leave this man possessed by the demon Satan!
The demon spoke to me in a tongue that only I could hear and understand.
He said, he said that he was going to eat this soul and he was going to eat mine as well and smoke came out of his mouth and nostrils. And flames flickered in the pupils of the man's eyes.
I brought the bible back across the mans face and said.
Luk 4:41 Demons also came out of many, crying out, “You are the Son of God!” But he rebuked them, and would not allow them to speak, because they knew that he was the Christ.
Luk 10:14-20 But it will be more bearable for Tyre and Sidon in the judgment than for you! And you, Capernaum, will you be exalted to heaven? No, you will be thrown down to Hades! “The one who listens to you listens to me, and the one who rejects you rejects me, and the one who rejects me rejects the one who sent me.” Then the seventy-two returned with joy, saying, “Lord, even the demons submit to us in your name!” So he said to them, “I saw Satan fall like lightning from heaven. Look, I have given you authority to tread on snakes and scorpions and on the full force of the enemy, and nothing will hurt you. Nevertheless, do not rejoice that the spirits submit to you, but rejoice that your names stand written in heaven.”
Then I laid my hand on his forehead and I said, "Satan you are a pussy, you know you are, and everyone in the kingdom of god knows you are. We all make fun of you, we laugh at your inadequacies and you inability to mount any type of real resistance to Jesus back in the day and today you are only as strong as the cable signal that transmits MTV."
“You Satan are a fucktard, wanna-be hardcore, ha you are a poser! That is right a poser! A cheap fancy pants copy of anything that is real and true. You are a fucking cheap knock off and I command you to leave this man now!"
I pushed back like I see in television and the man staggered back and back and then his eyes opened up and he wept.
He said “help me reverend help me please.” and he sobbed and he collapsed but the clever demon Satan had not vacated this man’s soul not just yet.
I opened the bible and read Luke 7 verse 20 through 23.
When the men came to Jesus, they said, “John the Baptist has sent us to you to ask, ‘Are you the one who is to come, or should we look for another?’” At that very time Jesus cured many people of diseases, sicknesses, and evil spirits, and granted sight to many who were blind. So he answered them, “Go tell John what you have seen and heard: The blind see, the lame walk, lepers are cleansed, the deaf hear, the dead are raised, the poor have good news proclaimed to them. Blessed is anyone who takes no offense at me.”
Satan you offend god, you offend Jesus, you offend me and most of all you offend this man now go! Go now! Or I shall call you by your real name and send you to hell for ever!
Satan reared back into life in the man's face. The tears turned to steam and he stood. I then realized that this man was bigger when Satan was at the wheel.
“John, you foolish mortal. Do you really think you can kick me out? Do you think you have enough in you to take me on?”
“Shit you are a pathetic boxer who beats women and old men.”
“Not true Satan I beat all mortals that need education, just as I will beat you and I brought the bottle across his chin.”
The bottle split open and sprayed water across his shoulder and he winced as if it hurt this time.
Satan bellowed "You blessed your bottle of water??
"Yeah it's a habit" I shrugged
Satan stepped back as I unscrewed the cap and said.
Luk 8:2 and also some women who had been healed of evil spirits and disabilities: Mary (called Magdalene), from whom seven demons had gone out,
“Satan is a pussy and Satan needs to go home.”
Now the crowd was larger and the crowd began to press in as the smoke from the man was getting thicker and the smell of rotting flesh was beginning to stick in my nose and I began to heave a bit. I am not ashamed to say that threw up a little in my mouth but I held it and I went forward with the exorcism knowing that I had Satan on the ropes and I spoke to the demon Satan and I said, “Satan you will now go and not bother any of us now or ever. You will go and tell your fussy pussy fucker turd friends in Hades that I am here now and I am going to rid the world of your evil and your evil ways.”
Luk 8:30 Jesus then asked him, “What is your name?” He said, “Legion,” because many demons had entered him. 8:31 And they began to beg him not to order them to depart into the abyss. 8:32 Now a large herd of pigs was feeding there on the hillside, and the demonic spirits begged Jesus to let them go into them. He gave them permission. 8:33 So the demons came out of the man and went into the pigs, and the herd of pigs rushed down the steep slope into the lake and drowned.
I placed my fists on my hips because it seemed a very super hero-ish thing to do and said, “Now go.” And with that I did a double round house kick and sent the demon sprawling. I leaped into the air and I dumped the remained of the water on the man and he screamed and he howled.
I brought the bible spine down on his forehead and said, “Demon go now! demon go now!” and with every drop of the bible I yelled “NOW!” and the crowd began to chant
“Satan go now! Satan go now!” and the murmur began to be come a choir of chanting for Satan to leave and the holy sprit came down and entered the man through his feet and I saw the spirit and I wept. I looked to heaven and as I did I saw the whole crowd weeping with happiness.
Luk 9:39 A spirit seizes him, and he suddenly screams; it throws him into convulsions and causes him to foam at the mouth. It hardly ever leaves him alone, torturing him severely. 9:40 I begged your disciples to cast it out, but they could not do so.” 9:41 Jesus answered, “You unbelieving and perverse generation! How much longer must I be with you and endure you? Bring your son here.” 9:42 As the boy was approaching, the demon threw him to the ground and shook him with convulsions. But Jesus rebuked the unclean spirit, healed the boy, and gave him back to his father. 9:43 Then they were all astonished at the mighty power of God.
And the bible spine broke again and pages of the gospel flew out and all around the man. And some landed on the man and he screamed and Satan come out of his mouth and the spirit followed chasing Satan and the crowd stopped chanting and the crowd gasped at the spectacle.
The man breathed in deep with a gasp as if coming up for air. His teeth were replaced the wounds from the bible and the bottle of water had healed. And looked to me as if for the first time and he stated what happened?
The crowed began to clap and we all helped the man to his feet.
He hugged us all as if we were family.
Then the manager stepped into the circle and said, “who is going to clean this mess up?”
“What have you done preacher? Goddamn it now I have to clean up the fucking mess. You people are out of control goddamn it.” And there was a flicker in his eye.
And I opened the bible and read:
Luk 4:31-35 So he went down to Capernaum, a town in Galilee, and on the Sabbath he began to teach the people. They were amazed at his teaching, because he spoke with authority. Now in the synagogue there was a man who had the spirit of an unclean demon, and he cried out with a loud voice, “Ha! Leave us alone, Jesus the Nazarene! Have you come to destroy us? I know who you are – the Holy One of God.” But Jesus rebuked him: “Silence! Come out of him!” Then, after the demon threw the man down in their midst, he came out of him without hurting him.
There are cookies and coffee and doughnuts in the foyer for everybody. I want everyone to remember that that on Christmas Eve I will be performing a midnight service and blessing foods for the Christmas meals that day. So if you would like your meal blessed bring the foods to the church that evening and during service I will bless the foods and drinks.
Please go in peace and have a great week!
Like A Monkey With A Handgun
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 3 December, 2007..
Also reading 
With A Mouthful Of Razorblades
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx
Release date: By 6 February, 2008..
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