Seven Deadly Sins: Gluttony

Seven Deadly Sins: Gluttony
Fast food revelations and mc-beatdown.
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Mar 7:22
adultery, greed, evil, deceit, debauchery, envy, slander, pride, and folly.

Today I am going to tell a story and talk about gluttony.

Fat people in line and a slow drive through bring me to get very angry and impatient. So this is the holiday season. The season of crass commercialism and giving. The season of shopping and eating poorly. Lucky for us the have perfected the eating poorly part to an art form.
Now you can get all the saturated fat and fake potatoes you can stomach.

Luk 7:34
The Son of Man has come eating and drinking, and you say, ‘Look at him, a glutton and a drunk, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’

We in deed and in spirit want to do the right thing but we are lost in pride, money lust, and sloth and so we stop at the place that is painted gold and red and offers many slow killers all prefixed with MIC.

Isa 58:7
I want you to share your food with the hungry and to provide shelter for homeless, oppressed people. When you see someone naked, clothe him! Don’t turn your back on your own flesh and blood!

Their fucking soulless marketing people began attacking the children so that as the generations got older they would know where to go for food. The bastards made fun characters and story lines so that the kids began identifying with this mega giant early on.
So here we are committing so many sins against god, personal financial freedom, our neighbor our family members and our bodies. We stop to eat at the temple of bad food and Satanism.

Everybody was hungry Moses spoke to god; god said that he would feed his people.
Exo 16:16 “This is what the Lord has commanded: ‘Each person is to gather from it what he can eat, an omer per person according to the number of your people; each one will pick it up for whoever lives in his tent.’” The Israelites did so, and they gathered – some more, some less. When they measured with an omer, the one who gathered much had nothing left over, and the one who gathered little lacked nothing; each one had gathered what he could eat.
Some saved a portion till the next morn and found it had spoiled and was infested with worms and maggots

If you can not guess I was X-Mass shopping and I stopped for something that could sedate the demon in the pit of my stomach screaming and growling it's discomfort.

Isa 29:8
It will be like a hungry man dreaming that he is eating, only to awaken and find that his stomach is empty. It will be like a thirsty man dreaming that he is drinking, only to awaken and find that he is still weak and his thirst unquenched. So it will be for the horde from all the nations that fight against Mount Zion.

The throng of people pushing and shoving was like they were all waiting to be blessed by the pope himself. They were all jockeying for position and protecting their position.
I am standing in line and this 5 foot 5 inch tall lady who was 3 feet wide and 3 feet thick cut in line in front of me. She and the three dogs fighting under her moo moo made me throw up a little in my mouth. I honestly have heard this analogy before but never knew or could even draw the image in my feeble mind. But here it was in front of me. When she stepped her ass cheek would lift to her shoulder blade and then fall.

Luke 6:25
“Woe to you who are well satisfied with food now, for you will be hungry.
“Woe to you who laugh now, for you will mourn and weep.

Ma'am the line is back there
No sonny your line is back there I am in a hurry and I need to go.
No ma'am your line is back there I am in a hurry too.
Listen preacher you can wait while I order

Mat 11:19
The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Look at him, a glutton and a drunk, a friend of tax collectors and sinners!’ But wisdom is vindicated by her deeds.”

No, you look like you could wait a century before you would starve to death and you will go back to the end of the line.

Isa 9:20
They devoured on the right, but were still hungry, they ate on the left, but were not satisfied. People even ate the flesh of their own arm!

She went to slap me and I held up the bible and tapped her forehead.
You are healed and the demon Beelzebub is commanded to leave you. You are to renounce the evil sins of gluttony and stop eating so much food.
You are commanded by god to commit one good deed in his name of the lord before you can eat any meals and she stopped. She looked at me and cried. The lady in line next to me now that was way too much.

Deu 21:20
They must declare to the elders of his city, “Our son is stubborn and rebellious and pays no attention to what we say – he is a glutton and drunkard.”

You just shoved your religion down her throat.
Better a little word of the lord than another fucking five hamburgers to clog her heart and cause her to loose her feet to diabetes.
But you can not do that!

Luke 6:22
“Blessed are you when people hate you, and when they exclude you and insult you and reject you as evil on account of the Son of Man! 6:23 Rejoice in that day, and jump for joy, because your reward is great in heaven. For their ancestors did the same things to the prophets.

Oh yes I can and I brought the bible down on top of her head and dropped her to her knees.
Do you not see the lord right now telling me to beat the word into you??
She shook her head and I brought the bible across her cheek.

Deu 28:48
instead in hunger, thirst, nakedness, and poverty you will serve your enemies whom the Lord will send against you. They will place an iron yoke on your neck until they have destroyed you.

She froze. She looked at me then to my right and then said "Oh lord how I have forgotten you and your word. Oh lord forgive me and my sinning ways." the fat lady helped the other lady up and they left together, weeping and praying.

Deu 30:1
“When you have experienced all these things, both the blessings and the curses I have set before you, you will reflect upon them in all the nations where the Lord your God has banished you. 30:2 Then if you and your descendants turn to the Lord your God and obey him with your whole mind and being just as I am commanding you today, 30:3 the Lord your God will reverse your captivity and have pity on you. He will turn and gather you from all

Gluttony is not just eating too much, but also eating too little, or eating too extravagantly. Really gluttony is the act of putting too much emphasis on the act of eating food. These people in line for food had put so much in the act of getting food that hey did not see the lord standing there beating the shit out of these two women.
The fast food Mecca is a temple for the demon Beelzebub.
This place should be avoided at all costs. They charge too much and they fail to distribute the wealth. They fail to assist in community projects other than that which they can use to further their own cause.

Luke 6:24
“But woe to you who are rich, for you have received your comfort already.

We need to remember that the body is a temple to the lord for the lord to reside in. And if you fill that with too much saturated fat the lord can not live and then you are alone



Deu
30:15 “Look! I have set before you today life and prosperity on the one hand, and death and disaster on the other. 30:16 What I am commanding you today is to love the Lord your God, to walk in his ways, and to obey his commandments, his statutes, and his ordinances. Then you will live and become numerous and the Lord your God will bless you in the land which you are about to possess. 30:17 However, if you turn aside and do not obey, but are lured away to worship and serve other gods, 30:18 I declare to you this very day that you will certainly perish! You will not extend your time in the land you are crossing the Jordan to possess. 30:19 Today I invoke heaven and earth as a witness against you that I have set life and death, blessing and curse, before you. Therefore choose life so that you and your descendants may live! 30:20 I also call on you to love the Lord your God, to obey him and be loyal to him, for he gives you life and enables you to live continually in the land the Lord promised to give to your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob.”

I just want to remind you all that the fatter you are the harder it is to get a punch in. You all need to get fit so that you can help in the fight to beat the sinners down and into the pits of hell.
You all need to think like warriors and be prepared to fight the good fight and fight for what is right and just like the word of god.
Please remember that we are a community and that as communities we need to stop and make sure that our neighbors are ok and that everyone in the community is getting along.
We have forgotten some of the others in the community during this holiday season.
We have many members that have lost their jobs and are in need of work.
Go and yell at each other in parking lot you fucking monkeys.

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

From My Graphic Novel

That i am working on. both the artwork and the writing.

Any publishers that are interested should get with me before i self publish.







This is a page from chapter 3.

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

In my neighborhood #11 By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10


In my neighborhood #11
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

There is always room for Jello.
The neighborhood association had their yearly meeting last Friday.
There was a bit of turmoil about some of the people moving in and some of the riff raff that have been seen walking the streets.
Many of the association are upset with Lee Ving about his handing of the board and his surprise placement on the board as president.
I understand that the president had to move due to health and personal reasons but also when you are known to associate with heroin users like Axle Rose does you know that you that are a health risk and should not accept any responsibilities.
How was Axle able to get financing to buy that house? I mean seriously though he looks like a drug addict, he sings about drugs.
And he should have never run for president but he did then he got "sick" and then he had to do a quick sale on the house.
A quick sale?? Why when your credit score is that of a welfare queen you need not to worry about a foreclosure on your report. But who am I to say anything? I do not want to gossip.
So Axle had to leave and in some secret unannounced board meeting Lee was placed in the president slot and the other spot is vacant. The subdivision has grown and the developer is releasing another board position to be held also so now we have two vacancies and a president that was not voted on.
This was a meeting I wanted to attend. I had some grievances to bring up and I think that to protect my investment I may need to participate.
The meeting was in a barrowed gymnasium of a church down the street. Apparently there was a lot of hoo ha because the management company had hired a couple of police to stand around eat cookies and drink coffee.
I was there early with my wife and son I wanted to maybe press flesh with a few and maybe feel out some of my neighbors on voting for me. I met with Wendy and Hammer they said that they would vote they did not care. Johnny said he would as long as I promised to keep the freaks out and I would not talk about Marilyn Mason any more.
Rollins said he was going to run just so he could get a spot on the board and get the approval of bird baths in the deed restrictions.
Kidd and Pam said they wanted to go but they decided to go to the lake. ha I think I smell a scandal. They gave me their vote in proxy.
Pink and Britney said they were having a party and did not want to go and they claim that they were giving their proxy to Henry as they know about the letter I wrote complaining about them and decided to waste their votes on freaking Henry Rollins! The bitches! com'on a wasted vote is a forefather's death being marginalized. Democracy is the breath of humanism and Judo Christianity. The pagan hedonist slut lesbians do not care about the neighbor and they deserve Ice T as a neighbor.
I arrived at what I thought was an early enough time to meet people as they came in and signed up but I was wrong, Jello was there handing out porn and popcorn to everyone coming saying, “A vote for Jello is a vote for me. ha ha ha no seriously vote for me Jello I am your new neighbor and I want to represent you on the board. I will pay attention to the needs, wants and desires of you common folk. I will protect the value of your homes while maintaining a free and artistic view on the deed restrictions.”
I am a former green party candidate nearly chosen to run for president but ousted by Ralph Nader the really old guy who hates convertibles and pintos.
I will bring you all to the meetings and I will speak your words to the board when decisions need to be made and restrictions placed on the neighborhood. I know you all I ...."
“Jello” I interrupted, “you do not know me and you do not care about my needs or the needs of anyone else in the neighborhood. You just want to run for a position and win. You have lost too many elections and your penis is shrinking for it. You want to swing your dick and you decide that my community is the place to do it.”
I continued, “You have not the slightest clue what the issues are do you?”
“Yes I do.” He shot back with the mannerisms of an autistic, “I know that there are basket ball hoops on the street and that some of our neighbors are also have birdbaths both of which are violations of the deed restrictions. I plan to right these wrongs and bring the value of our houses up.”
Shit now there were three candidates and two positions. I was fucked. I only had 1 proxy vote and maybe two votes promised. I had completely underestimated my goal.
I mean who can compete with porn AND popcorn?
Well I figured I could beat Henry, as I know that most hate bird baths so my plan now was to either beat Henry or get Henry to throw his support to my side. Either way I had to be on the board to oppose Jello or he would insist that all the dogs had to be dressed in Elmo suits and the kids had to learn the history of some obscure country that no-one knows exists. I could see it, every other house had to be painted purple and we will need armed guards at the subdivision entrances. We all know Jello is nuts and a hypocrite right?
I talked to Henry.
“Hey Henry” I said to get his attention away from the bird lovers magazine, “How do you feel about running against Jello?”
Henry looked up over his reading glasses, “Pretty good he is a nut job and everyone knows it.”
“Yeah and what do you think about me running against the two of you?”
“Aww Dude you got it in the bag.” Very confident like a performer should be, “I mean Johnny Cash has been going around talking you up to everyone and you know that everyone respects Johnny. Shit I wish I thought about getting the Cash-man's support.”
Hell now I had a renewed vigor and purpose and personal self-doubt and self loathing.
Maybe I was not right for the position I mean this is a lot of responsibility.
Naw fuck it! I want to run and I want to run some fuckers out of the neighborhood too.
Lee stood up in front of the neighbors and they boo'd and they razzed and they called for the tar, feathers and a rail.
"ok ok" Lee began, “We are here to go over the proposed increase in dues and the list of defaulted homes.”
“We have many changes that are up for vote...."” he was interrupted.
“BOO” “Fuck Off” A voice from the side.
“You suck.” From the back
“Now wait a minute we're from Frisco.” Lee said rolling his eyes back in a very bored action.
There was some laughing.
“Here some real money we want you to like us!” Digging into his pocket.
More laughter
“Seriously why do I have to go the same shtick every time we meet?” obviously pissed.
“Because you suck donkey nuts!” Came from the back
“But now the agenda calls for...”
And Lee rambled on and on for like 45 minutes with many interruptions. Then someone stood up and asked for Lee to step down. He called them a homo and told them to fuck off and then came the board member positions announcement.
Johnny Cash stood up and said that he would like to nominate Reverend John Sleestaxx.
Some murmuring and a female spoke in the back to second the nomination I turned around and it was Olga D'Volga.
Olga then stood up and said “John lives down the street from me and I just want to say Reverend Sleestaxx is very concerned about everybody and their safety. Whenever there is a party, the good reverend is out front to keep an eye on everything to be sure that everyone is safe.”
Britney stood up but she was so smashed that no-one could understand what she said.
They said they were not coming but here they are. I knew you could not trust the lesbians they are always too shifty to be trusted.
Jello stood up and started to nominate himself and everyone began to boo and spit.
“Poser!”
“Sell out!”
“Rock star!”
“Look what he did to his own band mates. And he called his fan base dumb punks in a song.”
“Fuck him! Get out now while you still have functioning lungs!”
“Now wait.” Jello started raising his hands in a defensive posture, “I know that you have concerns and you all want to protect your house values. I can do that if you all let me represent you.”
Henry stood up and nominated himself.
Crickets, nothing, dead air, silence.
“I want to affect change. I am about change; I will bring about positive change.”
“We know what you will bring.” Joey Shithead yelled from the front row “You will bring about bird baths and yard art.”
“No that is not what I am about!”
“I am about change and positive change that can co-exist with self expression and value retention.”
“I am about nature and communing with the earth and the little creatures that create the diversity that is earth.”
“I am about bringing in an era. Escorting in a new culture, and a new belief system into our diverse ecosystem that is our living space. Where we can express our desire to commune with nature and preserve our investments.”
“I want to find common platforms that we all can harmoniously co-exist.”
“Not some restrictive stifling, smothering, cookie cutter, complex of wood, brick, and stucco. Not a place where one’s beliefs are rammed down the throat of everyone in the subdivision because one person has all the power.”
"Henry shut the fuck up" shouted Lemmy "We all voted for “no yard art”, we all know that yard art leaves too many questions about what is art and what is not."
Lee interrupted,
“We need to vote, we have three candidates and two positions. Henry Rollins, Jello Biafra, and Reverend John Sleestaxx, Please write down a name, one name, and only one name the two names with the highest votes will be brought onto the board.”
“What about the president spot chimed.” MC Hammer
Lee spoke; “I currently hold the spot because Axle defaulted on his loan. This was a decision by the entire board and not some arbitrary decision made by me and when the other two spots are filled we will meet later and vote to see who will hold the president spot for the next year.”
Ballots were cast, ballots were counted and the elected candidates were announced.
Henry and I received the most votes, 137 182 respectively. Jello received 5 votes. Jello cried like a little girl who was just told by her BFF that she was ugly.
Henry and I did the dance of victory in front of Jello we pointed and yelled "in your face bitch" and did high fives.
Did I ever tell you all that I was a bad winner? I am. I like to enjoy my win; I want everyone to know that I won. So yeah, I am, by today’s PC standards, a bad winner.
This was the best time I had with Henry and I knew this was the start of a long whinny war about a goddamn bird bath.
It was nice to see some of my other neighbors and it was nice to know some of the new ones. It was nice to know that I am well liked in the subdivision and that Johnny is on my side.
Lemmy scares me though, I am afraid he is going to turn his garage into a biker ice house. We will have to see.
But right now I am in charge and ready to make some real changes across the board.

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

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Baseball season starts next week.

Baseball season starts next week.
so does Softball.
This year i am signed up for tournaments for both sports and for both leagues.
Looks like i will be doing softball two nights a week and baseball two nights and starting this weekend i will be doing tournaments every weekend.
Good because i was feeling low on hatred and anger.
Time to filler up.
Coaches! we are on the clock!


"do not argue with an idiot. people watching will not be able to tell the difference"

Fish Fashion Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Fish Fashion
Rev. J. Sleestaxx

There are some days I like nothing better to do than to pull a pair of marlins and go for a walk around the neighborhood.
The only trouble with that is that on warm days I can not get farther that a couple blocks before the cats in the neighborhood start to follow me around.
The sea gulls have begun to hover around my house now as they have learned over the past years that I like to wear fish. And they can get free meals from what I throw away.
Fish fashion is not a widely known trend and in fact is has been wrongly dubbed a fetish. Fish fashion is not a fetish but a statement plain and simple. It is a reaction to the killing of land animals for their hides and the killing of plants for their fibers.
Fiber wearing individuals are oblivious to the screaming that can be heard in the fields during harvest. The killing of carbon dioxide scrubbing plants for the sole purpose of making fabric is both insane and barbaric.
I once dated a girl in college that was a bologna wearer. And she was the reason I found wearing alternative clothes was fun.
We had dated for about three weeks when she said she had a secret. I am thinking that she was going to tell me she was a man or that she went to my high school and had a secret crush and now she was going to kill me for ignoring her.
Are you a Satanist??
No sweetie I like to wear bologna.
What??
I like to wear clothes made out of bologna. Mainly dresses and skirts because the bologna tears when you try to wear the lunch meat as pants.
“Undergarments too?” I asked
No that would be weird and kinky.
Yeah and?
Do not make this into something more than it is.
And so I dumped her. Well I just stopped calling and returning her calls. That was too weird for me.
She married a Greek guy whose father owned a deli or a butcher shop or something. They sent an invitation to the wedding. It was made of olive loaf and headcheese. I ate it but did not RSVP.
Then one day down by the docks I was talking to some fishermen and they caught a tuna. It was small and they had their limit and told me to take it.
Now what the hell was I to do with a tuna??
I was on my way home this fish in my arms looking up at me its gills gasping for air/water. Slowly dieing, drowning in air so to speak. I was feeling the texture of the fresh skin and scales and I realized that I had found my medium. What I needed was fresh fish to fashion my clothes out of.
I ran home with that first fish and made my self a tank top. There was not much to work with remember it was a small tuna.
And so started my fish fashion designing and experimenting with fish.
I started with canned fish which was great looking on the table and on the sewing machine, but when you pulled them on pants or shirt the whole thing began to look like punk fashion. A tear here and rip there.
But I soon discovered that I was not to use canned fish like gefelte fish, salmon, sardines, or even kippered herring.
I was to use fresh fish. I began to obsess with fishing. It was the only way to get the freshest fish. Every day I had off I was down at the pier fishing. And then I would rush home with the day’s catch and work feverishly into the night in the frigid house. I would have the air conditioner going full blast trying to keep the fish from decomposing.
Some days I would get the fashion done in time and I would be able to walk the neighborhood in fish and other days the fish would just slump off into a pile of stale rancid fish meat at my feet.
"Good day Reverend" the teens would say as they stopped skateboarding for me to pass, "Those are some mighty fine fish pants you have on." I knew that they too wish they had fish fashion to wear.
Herring bone? That is mine.

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

Spyware/virus fix instructions

Have you ever had a spyware or virus infection that just could not be fixed? Or you deleted a file and need it back.

One reason is the operating files that are infected and used by the infection can not be modified while windows is loaded and you can not use any removal software without windows.
catch 22
Well i have a technical post that can maybe help some with the answer.

Hardware needed:
1GB USB stick
or Blank CD

Software Needed:
Winxp sp2 http://Microsoft.com
BartPE http://www.nu2.nu/
HP Flashdisk Tool http://www.bootdisk.com/plan30/hpflash1.zip
Any extra BartPE Plugin ready
packages http://www.google.com

Any confusion or any extra
investigation refer to http://www.bootdisk.com/pendrive.htm.
I used this as a jump start for the following.

Note: The quote characters and
square brackets are for designation only and should not actually be used.

1. Format
   with HP Flash disk tool
2. On USB
   flash device make directory “minint”
3. Using
   BartPE software (pebuilder.exe) configure applications wanted and needed
   create build
4. In
   directory of BartPE build will be approximately 7 objects

[Etc]
[I386]
[Program
Files] (Note: This may not exist in your flavor of BartPE)
[Programs]
Autorun.inf
Bootsect.bin
WIN51Ia

5. Copy
   everything in [I386] to “minint” on the USB Flash device.
6. Copy
   “setupldr.bin” from [I386] to USB Flash [Root] and rename to “NTLDR”
7. Copy
   “NTDETECT.COM” from [I386] to USB Flash [Root]
8. Copy
   [Etc] from BartPE Build to USB Flash [Root]
9. Copy
   [Program Files] from BartPE Build to USB Flash [Root]
10. Copy
    [Programs] from BartPE Build to USB Flash [Root]
11. Copy
    any other files from BartPE Build to USB Flash [Root]

The root of the USB device should
look like:

[Etc]
[minint]
[Program
Files] (Note: This may not exist in your flavor of BartPE)
[Programs]
Autorun.inf
BOOTLOG.TXT
(hidden)
Bootsect.bin
COMMAND.COM
(hidden)
IO.SYS
(hidden)
MSDOS.SYS
(hidden)
NTDETECT.COM
NTLDR
WIN51Ia

Instructions for BartPE:
This application helps to create a windows build/install that can be run from a CDrom or a USB device.
The application is free but the application is in need of a winxp service pack2 CD.
BartPE is made by a german fella and some of the plugins maybe in german.
I find the clamwin and adware plugins the most important.
there are some file recovery programs included that work great if you delete a file and need it back.

Down load from the site mentioned.
run the install
start the "pebuilder.exe"
Click the "plugin button"
enable and disable any plugins you want.
Google for "bartpe plugins" will bring a large selection of free software to fix many problems.
Point the software to the winxp files needed
point the software to the location you want to put the new files
choose a name for the ISO (cd Image).
press build.
generally you can ignore the warnings but if there is any errors you will need to fix them before you have a working build.
i find that all of this is very straight forward but if anyone has any questions i am available to assist where i can.

Note: i have nothing to do with any site or software other than i use them i do not write software, i do not make plugs and i do not use or provide any free software or any bootlegged software.

Disclaimer: i am not responsible for any damage you do to your pc.

Steroids

I can tell you a couple groups that are not using performance enhancers.
The
DMV, The bagger at my grocery store, the fucker that just pulled out in
front of me infront of starbucks, and couple co-workers.

In my Neighborhood #10 By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

In my Neighborhood #10
By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

It was my birthday the other day and I wanted to have a huge bar-b-que party to celebrate. I invited just about every one of my neighbors and some friends over to have bar-b-que.
I was cooking, I like to cook, and I have the griller grilling chicken and other stuff and the BBQ pit cooking pork and beef. I had the turkey fryer boiling mudbugs and vegetables. I even had a huge pot of rice and sausage jambalaya cooking.
I had been brewing beer for 6 months for this occasion. I wanted this to be a huge blow out.
Just about everyone was there and we where all having fun. We set up the stereo and we all took turns playing songs from our iPODs (not a plug).
Wendy played selections from Motorhead [Killed By Death], Girls School [it Turns Your Head Around], and The Runaways [Cherry Bomb],
Lemmy returned the favor by playing a track from her WOW album [Legends Never Die] and a couple tracks from the damned [So Messed Up] [Born to Kill]. Lemmy was not paying attention and his iPOD (not an endorsement) started "Never Gonna Give You Up" by Rick Astley. We all booed and laughed, Kidd screamed I've been Rick rolled at a preachers house.
I do not know what the hell triggered this, maybe we were all having too much fun, or there was too much laughter, or just the fact Prince felt a disturbance in the force, but he just jumped up and started on a rant. He was screaming about beef and the terror that the cows are faced with knowing they are heading to their demise. That at the end of this metal and wood hallway is a guy with a pneumatic gun to displace brain matter.
“I do not think the cows are thinking quite that Prince.”
And he just keeps going on and argues and yells he starts talking about "the indecency of it all" and "the mistreatment" and "the raising of cattle to kill and eat! How barbaric"
blah blah blah “holy crap someone take the beer away.!”
Hammer stands up and says, “No I will tell what indecent is, it is you opening for The Stones in briefs, boots, and a coat. What the hell was that all about? Now, I will tell you, that is indecent! Can I get a witness??
“Halleluiah!” I hollered and high fived Pam, who was sucking the keg.
McHammer continued, "Dude there are some things we all do not want to see and your package is one."
Prince fired back at the Hammer-man, “Yeah ok I think I still have cornea scares from “Pumps and a Bump” on youtube bitch!
“Ouch!” I cried and I had tears in my eyes form laughing.
We laughed while he just went off. Jumping up and down, ranting and raving, about the injustice and indignity, the failures of our organs from processing meat instead of vegetables. This little guy standing on chairs and hollering was very comical.
He was screaming about the unfairness and there was more laughter when Kidd said “Hey John tell us about the word fair.”
I put the fork and tongs down in the sauce, "Fair is a four letter word starting with an F. This word is nothing more that a secret phrase uttered to say I lost and I want to blame it on someone else. Fair is what is said by those that do not practice and want to compete but can not because they feel they should not have to practice. Fair is a word for pussies and losers. Can I get a witness?” “Damn Skippy reverend!” Thank you. Fair is the handcuffing and handicapping to make all the little kids feel good and think that there is no such thing as losers.”
Wendy jumps out of her chair dropping one of her bottles of beer. Damn Skippy John, damn Skippy.”
Dusty screams for the loss of the beer. “Oh no you didn't, oh no you did not just spill beer! And then Dusty falls back into a drunken coma.”
We all laugh at Jeff and ignore Prince.
He gets more agitated and angry. He looks to Mc Hammer for something. Hammer checked his watch in an attempt at ignoring him and then "Yeah pastor do you have any more ribs?"
“Ahhh what the hell is wrong with you all.” “Eating meat is bad. Killing is bad. You are all going to hell.”
"That is enough Sheky!" I slap down the tools of a cook, mop sauce splashes out of the pail and the fork twangs on the table.
"You have been invited to enjoy food and drink at my house."
“And all you have been asked to be is personable, charming, and human in return."
“But” he stammers
“But nothing bitch! I have made tofu dogs, veggie burgers, soy by-product imitation ribs.
MC Hammer spits out his food.
“No Hammer yours is real pork I went running last night.”
He smiles.
“But I can not keep quite with the smell of meat and death in the air.”
“Suck it up bitch, meat is meant to be eaten. We have sharp teeth for a reason and that is because we are to eat meat. Now eat the fucking fake meat and shut up!”
Just then, Lemmy, who is a mountain of a man, if there ever was one, came out of the house.
"Hey do not go in the bathroom for a while..." And then before any of us could say ‘stop’ there was a little crunch and a pop sound, Lemmy froze.
Lee Ving says while laughing hysterically "Hey Lemmy you stepped on Prince and I think you broke him."
Lemmy lifts his foot like one would do if they stepped in something of the fecal group.
“Ah man.” He said, “Now the shoes are ruined. Damn it!”
I chimed in “Do not go back onto my carpet with those shoes on. There is a hose on the side of the house by the drive way.”
I tell my son, "Go help Lemmy clean the artist formally known as Prince off his shoe.”

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007

I Have Completed My Second Book

Now I was working this in tandem with Monkey but there was some material i wanted in this book that had not been written yet. so there is nearly half unpublished material here.
i was also told to not publish any more sermons in any more blogs. i can not explain why but i am working on this also.
I am now working the language translations of these two.

	Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007..
	Also reading With A Mouthful Of Razorblades By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 6 February, 2007..

In My Neighborhood #9 Rev. J. Sleestaxx

In My Neighborhood #9
Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Jesus Christ moved in behind Kidd and Pam next to Pink and Britney.
This was ok but things have started to happen. The first Friday after the Christ man moved in was a party day for Pink and Brit as is always the weekend. Well Christ has a history of not liking excessive debauchery like that which occurs at Pink and Brits house on the weekend. He made the frogs rain from the sky. Not just regular green frogs or toads but poisonous ones. These bastards caused huge boils and sores on your head and skin where they touched you.
The down pour of frogs was kept to the house of Pink and Brit but the little fuckers would hop over to my yard and I then touch me.
Every dog that I had came to life. I had 3 dogs that had died and were buried in my back yard. Now I have 3 zombie dogs that need constant care. I wonder if my home owners insurance will cover dog bite from a zombie dog. I mean really how different is a bite from a normal dog verse a resurrected dog. The dogs are not any different from normal dogs they do not shuffle around in the back yard and act as real dogs. I think that I will not tell any body about the resurrection and leave it at that.
This was not restricted to my yard either. the entire neighborhood is being over run by the resurrection of all the dead pets, Parakeets and cockatiels, cats and hamsters, guinea pigs and turtles, all roaming the neighborhood. Did I mention that there was an old grave yard? Have you ever tried to talk to an old farmer and explain that his farm is now your yard.
Since Jesus' move in have noticed an increase in lepers, cripples, the blind, and whores ion my neighborhood. All of which is ok because there is nothing wrong if you are a leper, I am as tolerant as the next guy. I have a leper as a friend Joe the leper. Maybe you know him or maybe you can see him as a friend on my myspace account. But the lepers that do not make it to Jesus' house are the problem, they become these juicy slick puddles on the street that become these road hazards causing slick spots on the street. Imagine hitting one of these leper spots as you turn the corner at night going 40 miles an hour. It is not pretty!
The Baptist church down the street got wind that Jesus was living there, they have been trying to prove he is not the “Jayman”. Plastering every house with flyers and going door to door like the Mormons when they are on mission.
They have also been sending Baptist ninja pastors to raid his house at night. Using all the stealth that Baptist ninjas have they scale Jesus’ 6' fence. Then they descend upon his place of residence only to be thwarted by Jesus and his great samurai parabolic power. This is truly an awesome gift that Jesus has. They crash through into the house screaming "pagan" "anti-Christ" "blasphemer!”. Jesus does not even bother to stand but begins to tell the pastors stories that have hidden meanings. The pastors try to fend off the logic with quotes from the bible to justify their irrational thought and self punishment but Jesus is too quick and his kung fu too great and they all fall in line and leave to join the Catholics.

Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007

8 games of softball this weekend

All games are 55 minutes
Game 1
plate 55 minutes 12u fast pitch
Lost the bottom half of the zone for 3 pitches. reminded me that timing was utmost in calling balls and strikes one never wants to lose a strike.

Game 2
plate 55 minutes 12u fast pitch
tipped ball down with 2 strikes
I watched ball with all clarity and full vision
ball hits dirt and into glove
i call "foul"
coach calls time
says that the ball was caught
No coach i watched that ball all the way to the dirt and into the glove
can you ask for help on that?
No coach i saw the play clearly and there was no obstruction to my view i saw dirt fly and then leather.
coach is pissed.
pitcher pitches ball 3 now full count
Pitcher pitches dribbler to short and batter oput before getting to the 2/3rd mark on the baseline
After the game my partner says he thought the ball was caught. I know what i saw and i can not for the life of me figure these things out when a partner says that there was something different.

Game 3
Bases
Timing good a couple bangers but i sell them with the timing it is amazing what timing will do for an umpire.

Game 4
Bases
same as game 3

Game 5
plate
Nothing to say
Lost 1 strike high outside. if i had waited another second i would have called that a strike

game 6
Plate lost 2 strikes at the bottom of the zone again. but i also lost 3 balls so i was ahead by 1 strike yeah me. timing timing timing gad damn it john slow the fuck down what is your hurry.
At some point i pissed off the third base coach. i do not know exactly what the deal was because it was sort of random but the coach came half way down from the third base line and yelled at me to clean the plate. I could see the corners and the front edge and the dirt was minimal.
I called time and called the coach over to me.
Coach we have a problem.
whats that?
You were just out of line
i was ?
yes?
So here is the deal i am giving you.
what?
no listen to me carefully.
ok
I will clean that plate off and you will go all the way out to the parking lot.
or we will leave the plate the way it is and you will be quiet and never yell at me or tell me to do anything for the rest of the game.
Really?
yes coach
alright you are right the plate is fine.

Game 7
bases
Partner appeared to have lost the entire zone for an entire 1/2 inning. so much so that the coaches all started to complain and my partner had a private conference with the manager and every was quite. but the zone was not fixed.
Now that is to say from where i was it looked like that but he was there and closer he knows what he saw. if he had asked my i would have told him that too.

Game 8
bases
obstruction at first base real bad. protected to second.
batter Interference at the plate partner called runner out. coach came unglued. i let coach chew fro about 30 seconds and when he started to repeat him self i stepped up and told the coach hat that was enough and to go back to his third base box. he started to bitch at me about the play. i told him that it was interference and that the runner was out. he started to complain some more i motioned for the coach to come to me. i explained that i was doing him a favor by letting him stop now and go to the box.
he asked a "doing me a favor"
Yes coach because any more conversation about this play at all will result in an ejection.
Me?
Hey i just said i was doing you a favor
so what is is going to be.

In My Neighborhood #8 By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

It was garbage day and I was putting the cans by the curb and I hear "what Up Dawg".
Why does anyone believe they have the right to call me a dog and not get their ass kicked. Oh well. I turned to find Vanilla Ice standing there in all his heavy metal tattooed glory. Although he was now a proud metal performer and he had shed the “white boy who could dance” he reeked of poser.
He had had his fight with drugs, divorce, and scandal that had not really put a real edge on him. He was still looking every bit the poser, the fake, the wanna be.
I do not remember him moving in anywhere.
“I just moved in last night, into that house over there.” He points to Marilyn’s house. The one across from Johnny, and I best not speak any more about that matter.
“That house there?” I asked.
“Yeap, signed the papers yesterday and everything. He smiled the smile of a car salesman. Yeap that’s the ticket. Signed the paper yesterday.”
“You know who used to live there before you.”
“No no-one its mine who’s been talking and what have they been saying? Cause I signed the papers yesterday.”
“Yeah you said that.”
“You want to see them?”
“No, no dude that will be quite all right.” Hoping to end this stupid banter.
“Cause you know I was totally crucified over a double beat that every could not get except my manager and producer.”
“I want to make sure that everyone knows that this is my house.”
“I built it and everything with my own two hands, hammered the nails myself. plumbed the copper tubes myself.”
“Copper pipes” I corrected
“What?” he was clearly lost in an alternate universe and did not have a map to get back.
“Copper ….yeah uh O Kay what ever”
“No dude really I did.”
“Sure you did what ever.” I said less convincing than I wanted to be.
“You know what you better show some respect.”
“Or what? “ I challenged.

I'm trying to get away before the jackers jack
Police on the scene you know what I mean
They passed me up confronted all the dope fiends
If there was a problem yo I'll solve it
Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it
Ice 1990

“No dude relax just relax.” And I am thinking please do not sing any more of that fucked up lame ass song or it may get embedded into my brain for a week.
“I do not care in fact it is probably better you moved in.”
“Why? What’s up?”
“Here's the deal what ever you do, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT landscape that front flowerbed. Leave the flower bed alone and you should have no trouble at all.”
“The flower bed?” he twisted his forehead all up and you could almost hear the one functioning gear grind on all the stripped ones.
“Yeah, you see Johnny is very particular about his view.” I said kind of leaning in and whispered, trying to make it seem official.
“HEH, Johnny Cash? Really? No problem. I do not want any trouble with him I heard he killed a man just to write a song.”

Gunshots rang out like a bell
I grabbed my nine all I heard were shells
Falling on the concrete real fast
Ice 1990

"Yeah, ok." I said getting bored with the conversation already.
"Welcome to the neighborhood." I said not really to him but just out there so I did not seem like an asshole.
And I turned away. Thinking to myself, "Can I live with Vanilla Ice in my neighborhood? Can I pull a Johnny and make the house vacant?"
Milli Vanilli tried that squatting thing with the model, but everyone knew they were squatting and the house builder knew the model was not sold. They were not the sharpest tools in the music industry either.
Here at least Vanilla is trying to squat a sold house.
I wonder how long he will be able to stay there before anybody realizes he is squatting and the house is like his music, not his own.

Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007

Penis Panic By Rev. J. Sleestaxx

Penis panic
Genital retraction syndrome (GRS), generally considered a culture-specific syndrome, is a condition in which an individual is overcome with the belief that his/her external genitals—or also, in females, breasts—are retracting into the body, shrinking, or in some male cases, may be imminently removed or disappear. A penis panic is sometimes a mass hysteria event or panic in which males in a population suddenly exhibit symptoms of genital retraction syndrome.
Penis panics have occurred around the world, most notably in Africa and Asia. Local beliefs in many instances assert that such syndromes are often fatal.
Genital retraction syndrome in Southeast Asia is known as Koro (Malaysian/Indonesian), which means "head of a turtle", apparently due to the similarity in appearance of a retracted penis to the appearance of a turtle withdrawing its head (Cheng 1996). In Chinese, the term used for the condition is the Chinese term Shook yang (suo yang, ??). Outbreaks of Koro in China were reported in 1948, 1955, 1966, 1974 and 1984/85, although none have been reported in the 20 or so years since (Tseng 2006).
In cases where the fear of the penis being retracted is secondary to other conditions, psychological diagnosis and treatments are under development. It is becoming increasingly clear that these forms of mass hysteria are more common than previously thought.
The phenomenon is often, but not always, associated with occult belief, such as witchcraft. These panics frequently, but not exclusively, occur in places where access to education—particularly in science and human biology—is limited, or otherwise restricted (for example, when government policies restrict such education). Others have been reported under the influence of drug use. (Compare with castration anxiety.)

These uneducated men are suffering from Penis panic. they are afraid that if left alone their penis' will up and disappear. Poof gone. They are very attached to their penis' they feel their penis is their power. It is their man hood embodied in a fleshy organ.
They should be and would be more scared if they knew that the loss of their penis would mean the loss of a seat in heaven. That is right your penis is your ticket to heaven

Penis Panic In religion
Gen 17:14
Any uncircumcised male who has not been circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin will be cut off from his people – he has failed to carry out my requirement.”

Why "cut off" and "circumcised" are in the same sentence i do not know, but it scares me.
None the less What the lord is saying treat ones self as a temple, be prepared to receive the lord and keep clean the temple of the lord.



Deu 23:1
A man with crushed or severed genitals may not enter the assembly of the Lord.

The lord wants a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman.
The lord does not want us to be committing sacrilege or adultery. He wants us to respect our privates and the privates of others.

Deu 25:11
If two men get into a hand-to-hand fight, and the wife of one of them gets involved to help her husband against his attacker, and she reaches out her hand and grabs his genitals, 25:12 then you must cut off her hand – do not pity her.

Do not be touching the genitals of another man that is not your husband. Do not disgrace and embarrass another man other than your husband.

Penis Panic In society

Boys running around with their shit stained underwear showing. These pants are down to the point it looks uncomfortable to walk and now they are holding up their pants by holding onto their packages.
Some how they think this looks attractive to the ladies. Guys women are into clothes right? They are into looking good? They are into getting the right attraction drawn to them right? Then why would they want to be seen with you and your pants falling down?

Eze 23:20
She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.


1Sa 18:25
Saul replied, “Here is what you should say to David: ‘There is nothing that the king wants as a price for the bride except a hundred Philistine foreskins, so that he can be avenged of his enemies.’” (Now Saul was thinking that he could kill David by the hand of the Philistines.)

The king thought the David could not accomplish such a goal and thus be killed trying to collect the items to marry the kings daughter. Now isn't this normal of a father he wants his daughter to be beautiful and desirable but he does not want to let her wed.

1Sa 18:27
when David, along with his men, went out and struck down two hundred Philistine men. David brought their foreskins and presented all of them to the king so he could become the king’s son-in-law. Saul then gave him his daughter Michal in marriage.



Explains why young men walk around holding their packages.

Civilized world, progressive societies, and science are Marginalizing the penis. The man's penis is no longer a useful appendage much like the appendix and the gall bladder. Kind of like how Mr. Jones thinks of his liver.
Gene splicing will replace natural selection. natural selection was there to improve the species, the strongest males got the most women and thus the strongest genes were carried on but now with gene splicing here is no need to evaluate partners just have science splice out the weak (or the poor) and the world will beco0me a new place in just a few generations.
Cloning is also a threat to procreation and linage survival. if you got good stock then why waste time with sex and pregnancy just add a couple of cells and electricity and velioa. New human same human who cares? It is a human. Now sequestered in a lab we can train it the way we want and remove all the messy things like free will, free thought, and ethics. No god? No fear of killing.
Artificial insemination why transmit diseases when sperm and egg can be brought together with turkey baste (I know obvious but it is my sermon). No need again for the penis and the messy bumping and grinding and emotions that go with the penis. They are just men they do not care they do not have emotions. blah, blah blah, puke spew.

This hatred for the penis is a trend. This desire to obscure the need for the penis is a move that I can hear the chanting on the whore-izon "Attack that penis" "Attack that penis" "Attack that penis"
The government knows the score, they have placed stop measures to thwart the penis it is called EOE equal opportunity employment. That is right, they say that corporations need to hire a certain number of women or they will be penalized for discrimination. This law alone has created corporate Koro. Companies are now looking specifically to hire women so they can appear to be more diverse.
talk to anybody who has spent anytime around women in the workplace and they will agree that women can be mean petty bullies, castrating any man at the first chance by screaming harassment. Once that card is played all bets are off and the women are in charge.
Women in the workplace (ratio shows that women are mean petty criminals)

Killing the penis and killing god are the main agenda of any modern society.
There are companies that are focused on creating Synthetic life. They can not copyright known life so they have to create it. We would not have the knowledge if god did not want us to do it. God did not want us to eat the apple but we did it. No woman did that she was jealous of the penis. Eve had penis envy and thought that eating the apple would give her a penis and instead she ruined the garden. HMMMMM
If successful proves that god did not have a hand in our creation it was a statistical anomaly how does that sound?? Instead of god we are here because of a cosmic roll of the protein dice and oh shit look what we have now.
No god would create a whole new set of rules in life why should i drive the speed limit and why should I not shoot others is there is no real repercussion. It all comes down to a reward over risk equation. We balance the weights and decide. If there is no consequence for this action then pass the ammunition!


Penis Panic??
Really do you think this is a hysteria condition or maybe the entire world and the direction of society is striking a cord deep in the male psyche. Somehow we are in touch with and in commune with the world as a whole and some how we know that the world is out to take our penis away?
You penis hating women watch your shit you all may win but deep down inside you know that you need the penis. you need the strength and the power it is the balance of the world order old and new. the penis is the way. it is the way to the assembly of god it is the way of the future.
You man marginalizing feminists, your day will come, because one day you will need the killer of dinosaurs and the bringer of food and fire and then where will you be? Where indeed? All great advances in the world and progress came from the penis. But do not be mistaken there was a woman driving that penis. We are a team. You can not do it with out us for long. You will be sorry when you have killed the last penis.

Be careful what you wish for you might get it.

Why am i talking so great about the penis? The boys are feeling castrated due to the weekly boxing matches between the boys and the girls. It seems that the girls champion has whooped so much boy ass that they called for testing. She came back NF (normal female) on the chrome test and steroid free on the blood test. You all need to get your shit together and figure it out. All of man kind is relying on you.

Fruits and vegetables are in the commons for the every one curtsey of the "Single Christians Against Bar hook ups" and the Knights of Acrimony.
Go in peace and do not kill each other in the parking lot.

Currently reading Like A Monkey With A Handgun By Rev. J. Sleestaxx Release date: By 3 December, 2007