We need to be competitive

We need to be competitive and we need to make some changes
By Rev J. Sleestaxx

This was thought out as a video lampooning some CEO of some company but I was worried my CEO would think I am lampooning him, I wanted to keep my job and because of safety reasons I have to still maintain some anomitity (a couple more deaths to go.) so let us look at this like a cult talking about individual competition.

We need to get more competitive.
So my plan is to stream line our interests so we will lose weight.
We have lost 10% and that is great can you all feel the new found agility. I know that the process to lose weight created some hardship but the reward is a trimmer, fitter ready-for-competition us.
All though we still need to make some changes. We have been developing some relationships with outside people to help us be more competitive. And since our partners can make stuff and we are right handed we will cut off just our left hand. We can make things with just right hand and I know it can be difficult but we need to adapt to be competitive.
We have made it through the change and it has been great. I know I understand and I appreciate the work that is being done. But since we have we cut off the left hand we will now remove the left arm. The arm served its purpose but these are new faster exciting competitive times. But we are now a one handed community.
We can and do build with just one hand but our partners have two and they can build and make more efficiently than us leaving us to be mobile and able to focus more on being competitive. So we will remove our right hand and from past experience we know that the right arm is not used without the right hand so rather than go through the removal of the hand and then the removal of the arm we will leverage from past experience and remove the arm and hand at the same time.
Well done. Well done! We are now able to focus on being competitive and mobile. We can still think and talk, we can interface well AND be mobile.
Ok we have done much to be competitive, but the challenges ahead are great so we have reviewed our plan and found that there are areas that we do not fit. So, for us to fit in more areas, to be more competitive we have decided to cut off the feet. We will still be mobile and since it was decided to do both feet we will get ahead of the curve.
Good, good fantastic numbers and the move to cut off our feet has help us realize an area that has little competition so that means that the removal of our legs will put us in a better position competitively. We can open partnerships that are more competitive in the overly competitive area of mobility. We will still be able to think and communicate therefore we can still compete in other areas with the help of our alliances and partnerships. This may be difficult but I know we have the ability to persevere and overcome.
Fantastic I told you all this was a good decision. We are now in a whole new field and we are very competitive. I think you all know the next logical step.
It makes sense and it will off load the burden of thinking and communicating that we do and put that on to our partners leaving us to focus on our core we will be the only ones so there will be no competition which is the goal of any competition and that is to win.