A Stinky Contraption

 The shoes were a stinky contraption of leather, rubber and canvas held together by man made threads. The logo design was no longer important because they just hung on the wire. On the wire the shoes told everybody that a bad man lived here and to stay away.

Everyday they were a constant reminder to him that he let a banger take his shoes. Shoes his daddy bought for him, just before he left. His momma was so mad when he came home that she beat him.

 And now he hides under the porch smoking pot barefooted in the mud.

White trash zombies.

 There was a ruckus coming from the single wide trailer next door. Edgar said, “Shit Betty they're at it again.”

 “Yeah? Well don't talk to me abut it, I am busy, Jerry's on!”

  Edgar mumbled something as he looked out the window at the single next door.  He could see the shadows of movement and the noise was just getting worse.

 This kind of crap happens when the checks get in. The whole park gets loud on the 1st and 15th of every month.

 Everybody gets liquored up and gets rowdy.

But the zombies next door just creped him out.

You gonna let’em call you that?

“That’ll be seven sixty seven buddy.” Said the clerk.

The guy behind me said. "Buddy? Last I heard a buddy was a bump on a dog's ass. Don’t let him call you that?"

He was right. No Mother Fucken human should be allowed to call anybody "buddy" that’s just too disrespectful to let slide. So I took my Slurpee and beef jerky out to my car and got my gun. I went back in and shot the bastard in the knee.

 I told him, while he was crying like a little girl, that he better think about calling people names.

The Drought Is Over! October 18, 2012 : 13:39

The Drought Is Over! October 18, 2012 : 13:39

Almost 80% of the country is underwater:

“The latest weekly Drought Monitor update set another record. The brutal U.S. drought Lowered to 21.05% of the contiguous U.S. — the lowest ever in the Monitor’s 12-year history. The previous record was 31.80% — set just last week.” China's weather machine broke early last week and the entire country has been inundated with rain and massive flooding.

 A unknown government source was quoted, "The US government cannot hide the water fast enough." People have to piss out the door as toilets have been backing up as the country's water table has risen to new levels.

  Curabitur non neque lectus. Donec sed lectus dui. Mauris dapibus nisi in neque mollis hendrerit. Ut volutpat sapien sit amet augue venenatis feugiat. Nam sagittis lacus ipsum, ut tincidunt eros. Maecenas at risus dui. Morbi id adipiscing nisi. Curabitur tempor pellentesque dui sit amet elementum. Aenean semper tortor non augue posuere a feugiat ipsum pellentesque. Cras in massa nisi.

 It appears that Canada is turning down visas as the American public sick of wet socks and stupid political rhetoric are trying to pour across the border into Canada.

 "We can't say no fast enough." said one para-military border guard in Milwaukee. "They just keep coming eh?"

 They fact that the earth is covered in two thirds of water is of no consolation to the poor individuals who are still swimming in New Orleans.

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Nulla id tortor nunc. Donec in nulla at tortor posuere ornare. Quisque auctor porttitor velit, at tincidunt lacus commodo in. Vivamus dolor nisl, pellentesque non mollis et, ultrices non tortor. Nulla auctor leo in arcu luctus sed feugiat odio cursus. Integer vel ipsum vitae nisi aliquam ornare nec vel mauris. Nullam at augue eu enim tincidunt lobortis. Nunc quis nisl eu arcu imperdiet bibendum eu eu purus. Class aptent taciti sociosqu ad litora torquent per conubia nostra, per inceptos himenaeos. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Phasellus cursus sapien et diam faucibus id porta enim rutrum. Aenean risus risus, faucibus et dictum sit amet, tempor vel nulla. Duis faucibus pulvinar scelerisque. Cras in purus sit amet tortor ornare feugiat eget eget tortor. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Duis pellentesque, dolor non adipiscing lobortis, ligula nulla faucibus mi, sed vestibulum nunc libero ac purus.

 See anyone can write a blog. Bitch! Oh Yeah your internet works awesome dude.